Personalisation of the thinking is the problem. Sailor Bob and team on ND. 14 Apr 2024

Oh, hi. Oh, hi. Igor? Mor. Ros. Agri. Kasha. Moin. Nina. Zulna. Carl. Jayne. Harbo. James. Melissa. Monty. Arete. Ainsley. Gran. Alita. Ariel. Joseph. Josh. Dane. Jason. And Bob. Oh, here. Oh, there. In the next one, I can't do that. And I can't do that. B Y- C- B- B- W- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- S- And they say in the Bible, where two or three are gathered together in my name, there I am in the midst. And what did Moses say on a mountain and he realised, I am that I am.

There was anyone in this room who was not saying I am. And that's what they're talking about, that's the one essence, which is in everything and everyone. And we all know that. That's why I say I can't teach you anything. I can't tell you anything. All I can do is point toward and ask you to look to where I'm pointing to, to see for yourself. Because if it's all the one, there is nobody who can teach you anything or nobody that can tell you anything. Another way I put it, I'm not speaking to anybody. I'm not speaking to any mind. I'm not speaking to that I am identity that you might believe yourself to be, but some of you already don't, which is a good thing.

I'm not speaking to anybody. I'm speaking to that I am that I am. And that I am is the sense of presence. The knowing that you are. And everyone is aware of being present right now. And everyone knows that I am. Just to this and nothing else. So that's what we try and point out here. And a lot of you I know that come here have recognised it already. And others might be hearing it for the first time or hear it a few times and still got questions about it. But we go over it again and again and again. Just the same, though we don't realise it, when you first learned words and your peer has told you I am little Jane or little Billy.

And from then on you've gone over that many, many times until it becomes the norm or the ordinary. You think I am this Billy or Johnny, whatever your name might be. Not recognise it as the sense of presence. Anyone who, which they call again in the scriptures, describing it as a Sat Chit Ananda. Nama Rupa. Sat is existence. Chit consciousness. Ananda is loving to me. And anyone who is not existing. No, you realise of course I am existing. Anyone who is unconscious or unaware. And you know I am not unaware or I am not unconscious. And anyone who doesn't want to be right now. If somebody is coming along and said I will kill you, you wouldn't be too happy about it.

So you are all happy to be. So if that's what they describe it in all the ancient texts. Recognise that you are already that. And then the search itself becomes the problem. And that's why they say, again we are here and don't take any attention. What you are seeking, you already are. And that's the fact. There is nobody who is not that. And that they're pointing to is the one essence. The sense of presence that expresses through the mind as the thought I am. And Shakespeare tells you there is nothing either good or bad. But thinking makes us hurt. How many words were you born with?

You weren't born with any words. So you didn't learn any words until you were a couple of years older. So you realise you are prior to the word. And all these words are a mind. You are prior to the mind. And you are being who you are. And you are at the 2 a.m. And you are in a very new way. And you are in a very new way. And you are in a very new way. And you are in a very new way. And you are in a very new way. And you are in a very new way. And you are in a very new way.

And you are in a very new way. And you are in a very new way. And you are in a very new way. And you are in a very new way. And you are in a very new way. And you are in a very new way. this idea that we are the separate entity, the individual, the person. When you look at it really, it all comes down to the words we've learnt. How can you say you were born? Because you didn't have any words when you were born. And you can't remember your birth. People say they remember their birth, but how could you? How could you say I was born when you had no words and you had no concept of time before you got the word?

So you couldn't. There again, Perrott points out that you are prior to mind, prior to thought. But when we take on the thought, take on the idea we are this separate entity, that's where all our problems come from. The belief that we are this individual, this person. And even the word person, when you look it up, it comes from the ancient Latin persona, the mask. Pointing out we've got this conceptual image, or mask. And we hide behind that mask. I am Bob, I'm so and so, I'm this, I'm that, and that, and all the other concepts we've taken on board. And that's the idea that I believe myself to be.

And that can come into all different words. I can be unhappy, I can be fearful, anxious, depressed, guilty. All these different labels, and take on the belief that I am. And that's, taking on that belief, that's how it appears. And, Wei Weiwei tells you, why are you unhappy? Because if you think you say, everything you do, and everything you see, is for yourself. And he says, there isn't one. There is no personal self. And there is no self. Those of you who have looked into these traditional religions, and all the rest of it, we've got this idea we are this person, we are this separate entity, we are this self.

And most of them that understand it will say there is only one self. The so-called Atman self. There is no personal self at all. There is no person. Because they tell you again when you look at it, it is the basic space of phenomena. The base of everything in this manifestation is space. Space has no beginning to it. Can you find a beginning to it? Look into these things and see for yourself. Can you find a center to it? Can you find any boundaries? Any limitations? You can't. Space is no thing. But try and postulate or think of something that can be outside of space.

What would it be in? It would have to be in something, so it must be the so-called space that it is in. So they call it space like awareness. That awareness is another word of putting such in and of. Existence consciousness, awareness of being is bliss. That space like awareness is what you are, which we put to different labels, patterns, shapes and forms, and take ourselves to be these separate entities. And see how that functions. And see how that functions. As Shakespeare called you three or five hundred years ago. He says there is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so. But thinking makes it so.

And have a look at the way you think. And realize that is so. You are always thinking in the interrelated pairs of opposites. Either in the past, which is memory. The future, which is anticipation, imagination. And in that range it is either good or bad. Pleasant, painful, happy, sad, loving, hating. Positive, negative, here or there. High or low. Or vibrating in the pairs of opposites. And that's when it's looked into, that's all it is. A vibrating pattern of energy. And they call it another way, they call it intelligence energy. Instead of using the term God. Intelligence is knowing. Anyone who is not knowing right now, of course you are knowing.

Energy is an activity, a movement. So intelligence is a movement. Energy is an activity, a movement. So intelligence is active. Energy is the activity of knowing. The movement. And that movement is going on right now. Breathing, beating your heart. Causing thoughts to arise. Feelings, patterns, shapes and forms. Everything are patterns of that energy. And it's a fuse of that knowing or intelligence. You know what it is. And we put other labels on to discriminate instead of seeing it as that. That's the great mantra. You heard that and how much notice have we taken of it? I know that. When you look at it, everything is that.

And you know it already. Because that's the chair I'm sitting in. That's the room the chair's in. That's the space in the room. That's the flower. That's the bird. Everything is already that which we've learnt words. And discriminate with the words. Seemingly separated into separate entity. When everything is that. So, that basic space. Space is no thing. It hasn't got any boundaries. Hasn't got any centre. Hasn't got any limitations. Any substance. Or any independent nature. What we don't realise is the very first thing you see. What are you seeing out of now? You're seeing out of your eyes. What's the first thing you see? Most of us will say, I see you.

Or I see this. The things in the room. But the very closest thing to your eyeballs is that space. And you realise that everything in this room and everywhere else is the content of space. Why they call it the basic space of phenomena. And that phenomena is absolute. What can you add to absolute? Or in Buddhism they call it the great perfection. What can you add to the perfect? You can't add anything to the perfect. You can't add anything to the perfect. It wouldn't be perfect if you could. You can't add anything to absolute. It wouldn't be absolute. You recognise that you are the absolute.

Who or what could ever be superior to you? And you realise there's nothing that can be superior to the absolute. If it's absolute, I must be that. And whatever I'm thinking of the other must be that also. You can't add anything to the absolute. There's no one superior to you. No one inferior to you. And what would you want from anybody else? You've got all these wars and things going on. People want this and want that country and want something else. And fights and arguments over what they're trying to acquire. Or trying to become this, that or the other. Or because of that belief, they're separate.

You recognise your true nature. And realise that you're being lived right now. You're not deliberately taking that breath you're taking now. You're not deliberately beating your heart. It's going on naturally, effortlessly and spontaneously. Then realise instead of trying to become something. And that's another thing. We call ourselves human beings. And we say being, knowing and loving to be. Is that satchit and nander in different terms again? Call ourselves human beings. You believe in God, there's something separate. You say God is the supreme being. What happens if you ask yourself the simple question? Or take that word, human, away. Human being, take the word, human, away.

Take the word, supreme, away. Anyone in this room can jump up and say, I'm not being. You can't. Because you know you are being right now. And being will never be becoming. Because becoming implies a future time. And when you look into time and investigate time. And ask the simple question, can there be a past if I don't think about it? Well have a look at that. Then you realise there can't be a past without a thought. And there can't be a future without the thought. And Shakespeare again tells you there's nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so. And realise we're either believing we're in the past, which is yesterday, it's gone.

Or in tomorrow, which is anticipation and imagination. Try and go back and live yesterday. You realise you can't live yesterday. You might recall some of it. And when you'll be recalling it, you'll be recalling it right now. So it won't be recalled in the past. It'll be a past, a seeming past event brought into the now. Refreshed and brought up again. The future. Can't anticipate and imagine the future. Imagine the future. So you can't, you might be thinking what am I going to do when I leave here. But it won't be the future, will it? It'll be imagining. And anticipate and imagining. So past and future are all conceptual.

What about this immediacy? Now? Well have a look at that. When does now begin? Well I'm aware right now. I'm knowing right now. It's beginning. Does it end? Or is it still right now? Well as a right now, doesn't begin or doesn't end. It is spontaneous. It's natural. It's always there. And we lose sight of it by going into the concept of time, past and future, pleasant and painful and all the rest of it. These are things that need to be looked at because they tell us again. That the false cannot stand up to investigation. And they say, know the truth. And the truth will set you free.

You've got to see that to be free from this conceptual image. That you are this separate entity that's fearful, anxious, depressed, guilty, unhappy, suffering. Recognize it's only a concept, a mental concept of thought. And the Buddha calls this livingness, he calls it a cognizing emptiness. And he made the statement that emptiness is form. He turned it round the other way and the forms can be nothing other than the emptiness. So it recognising and putting the labels, forms and empty on it, that's all it is. It hasn't changed its true nature from the space like awareness or emptiness. It has that capacity of knowing or cognising.

Definition of phenomena is that which appears to be. And all this, everything in this room and everywhere else is appearing to be so right now. But it's not, things are not how they appear. How they seem to bear. So they call this manifestation an adornment of space. Another thing you can say is that everything is the content of space. But space is no thing. Can something come from no thing? It can't. So you and I are things. The carpet on the floor, the room, the trees, the flowers. Everything in manifestation are things. Which we discriminate again by putting the labels on. The words. And in the beginning was the word.

The word was with God. The word was God. All things were made by him by the word. And there was nothing made that was made without the word. Isn't that so? Haven't we got words for everything? When you, when did you begin? You can't remember your birth. And you didn't begin until you were about two. Or two, or somewhere around that age when it was the first words you learned. So you didn't begin as that person until you learned the words. Here it's fussing around you. You told you you're little Billy or little Jane or whatever your name might be. And still of seeing the reality of it, they didn't tell you that you were absolute.

Because they didn't know themselves. You took on the label, I am little Billy or little Jane or little Johnny, whatever the name was. Somebody asked you today, who are you? You'll say I'm Jane or I am Bill. We've taken that belief to be real. We don't say that I am the absolute. You can't really go around saying it because the majority of people don't realise that. And I'll put you in the funny farm. You think you're claiming to be God or the absolute. But the word God is just another label, as you see yourself. But you're prior to the word. And you see that the word's not real when you look into the word.

Take the word water. Try and drink the word. Try and swim in it. See if you can drown in it. Take the word fire. Cook with the word. Eat yourself with the word. Burn yourself with the word. You can't. You can't. You can't. So what's this word? My or me. See it's just another vibration, another label. We've put upon ourselves. Now if you went to a department store to buy a dress or a shirt. And you came out with a label. Dress, shirt, you wouldn't be too happy. You'd want the thing itself. Well why don't you do the same with this? Instead of coming out with a word.

Have a look and see. That I am a little bit more than the word. I cannot negate the beingness. I cannot negate the knowingness. I cannot negate that love of being. I love to be. And as far as this person goes. What's this person? Well it tells me that I am the body. I am the mind. These thoughts. Well investigate that. Am I the body? I am the body. And innately you already know you are not the body. Because you say my body. You don't say my car. You say my car but you know you are not the car. You don't say, you say my house but you know you are not the house.

And you know you are not the, this thing or that thing. Well maybe you are not the body either when you investigate it. But when you do investigate you see it won't stand up. False doesn't stand up to investigation. What's this body made up of? See it is made up of elements. Made up of air, earth, fire, space, water. Take those elements out of your body. Stop drinking the water. See how long it would last without that amount. Take the fire, the body temperature. It seems to get hypothermia and die. Get out of space if you can. You see you can't get out of space.

Get off the earth. You can't. Not at all. So... Realise that all these words can be broken down. But you are prior to the word. You're before the word. And now you realise, look back, well if I didn't know any words until I was two, two and a half. I lived for that period without the word so I can't necessarily have to be the word. the word. Though I didn't know what was going on because I had no words but I was that pure life, that pure being, that pure functioning intelligence energy just like the nature around you. Nature's not saying I am the earth that I'm going to roll around the sun or I am the wind that's going to cause the storm or the waves.

I am the mountains or the hills or the stars or the planet. It doesn't say that at all. But it's all expressing as those things that we put the labels or words on and discriminate everything of the word. And as I pointed out then the word's not the thing. What about this word mind? My mind. Well show me a thing called mind if you believe me on the mind. I can't show anybody a thing called mind because there's no such thing. What we call mind is again thinking or words. We put the label on it's not mine. And what is mind when you investigate it?

It sees a sound. It's a vibration. It's a word. It's a concept. It's a thought. So all these things are appearing on this awareness or in this space like awareness. They're all appearing in that so it's just in with the content of space like everything else. So the word is not the thing. We use words to discriminate and describe things. And that's why they tell you when you look at this thing. The description is not the described. And the description will never be the described. So what we're describing here will never be its description. But it will give you a good point towards it. And in the looking and seeing it for yourself you'll realize that it is so.

You are prior to the word. The word is not the word. There is no such thing as I. I is a mental concept. A thought. An idea. And can the thought I see actually see? We realize a thought I see can't see. The seeing is happening through the eye. And it's translated by the thought I see. But it's not the eye you see. Ask yourself what's the next thought going to be? And you'll tell me I don't know. You don't know but a thought will come up won't it? When that thought comes up what do you do? You'll say I think this thought. We grasp it and capture it with that concept or image we have about I.

I think. Now we become the thought. or image we have about I. I think. Now we become the subject. The next thought has become the subject. I am thinking. I'm thinking this thought. The thought has become the object. So there it is. It's a vision. Instead of seeing everything as it is, now there's me or I and the other. Not me or not I. Dualism. And it goes on from there. And we continue to stay in this dualism. And seeing it, recognizing that and we recognize that as two separate things. Good and bad. Pleasant and painful. Not recognizing what they say. It's all the one essence.

There is only the one essence or the one life that's appearing appearing and expressing as everything. But now we've got two. I like it or I don't like it. This is good. That's bad. I am happy. I'm unhappy. I'm fearful. Or I'm at peace. It's all divided into the pairs of opposites now with words. But what happens if I see it's all the one essence. The words do not divide. Good and bad are two ends of the one stick. High and low are two ends of it. Near and far. Good and bad. All these vibrates into seeming two are not. It's turning two sides of the one stick, two sides of the one coin.

And you see how that functions in nature. We'll look out there in nature right now. That's why we talked to nature. Nature is the natural state. How things are naturally functioning, shaping, patterning and forming. Look out there in nature. It's daylight. This part of the earth is facing toward the sun. And it's the nature of the earth to revolve. It's turning around. It's revolving all the time. And as it turns around, it faces away from the sun and becomes dark. Now we've got daylight and dark. Does the earth know anything about daylight and dark? It doesn't. Does the sun know anything about daylight and dark?

It doesn't. But we discriminate and describe it, we divide it into two. When it's two, essence, two sides of the one coin. Because as it's daylight here, later on, it'll be dark. It'll be light again. As it here is going on for winter. What are we doing about that? Won't be long if it comes spring. And what do we do about that? Nothing. Then it'll turn into summer. And that'll come into autumn and the winter. Who or what is doing any of that? We think we're doing everything with the thinking. And these thoughts come up and we think, I think. That thought, I think, becomes the object.

I or me becomes the subject, the seeming person. and the seeming person is just a conceptual image. It's not real. Because you and I are just the same as nature. Leave the thoughts as they are. When something good, bad comes up, we try and keep it there. Not realising that it'll never stay there. Everything in its manifestation is transient. It's constantly changing. And the good thoughts won't stay there. But we don't want it to go. But no matter how much you love them, how much you want to keep them and perhaps you try, it doesn't stop it from going. It's going to go. We don't want it to go.

So we resist it. In that struggle, we try to keep it there. We struggle with it. And resistance is conflict. So we get into conflict with resisting all these thoughts. That conflict's come up all the time. The fear, the anger, the depression, the unhappiness. All because we're resisting something. Resistance, conflict, and dis-ease. Because that resistance makes you uneasy. You're fighting with it. You're struggling with it. Something comes up and you don't like it. Oh, I'm doing the wrong thing here. I shouldn't be thinking that. That's the wrong thing. I'll get into trouble. I'm a sinner. I'm evil. So we're resisting. The first one we're trying to keep there.

Now we're resisting this other one for being there. We want to get rid of it. So again, in conflict and decease. So you see why we're constantly unhappy and inferior and all the present. We're constantly going along with these concepts and the resistance and things that are going on instead of leaving things as they are. Unaltered, unmodified, uncorrected. And look and see how that works in nature. You go outside on a cloudy day. Would you say the sun's not in the sky? Now the clouds can seemingly obscure the sun. You don't see the sun. But you and I know because of investigation that the sun doesn't leave the sky.

But when you ask when you ask what forms the cloud you'll see, realise that the sun itself forms the cloud. The sun continues to shine and radiate. And in that heat and radiation what does it do? It evaporates water. It evaporates water and the water rises and condenses and cools down and forms the cloud. Now the sun doesn't know anything about the cloud but it forms the cloud which seemingly obscures it. Now the sun continues to radiate. That's all it does is radiate and shine. And might cause a wind to stir or cool things down and blow the cloud away. But that's happened. It just happened naturally, inevitably.

There's not somebody doing it. Like the same with this livingness. We think we are doing it. But we don't. It's that same life that's beating your heart, growing your hearing fingernails, digesting your food that's doing the lot. And you are that life. It's what Christ told you. I am the way. I am the truth. I am the life. People think he's talking about himself but he's not. He's talking about that life, that animating life essence or intelligence energy. that you are. That's the way to go. Stay with it. How did you come about? Well, investigate that. You'll say, I was born but you don't remember your birth.

You don't know. But how did you come about? Well, go back as far as your father and your mother. That animating life essence, that intelligence is in your father through the food he's eaten and the breath he's taking and what he's living on and all the rest of it. A navel in that pattern a little microscopic particle called a sperm to form. You can't see it with a naked eye. It's nothing. That sperm was suffused with intelligence. It's suffused with life. It knew what to do. It attached itself to all the uterus. And the sperm, knowing what to do, swam to the ovum. Again, pointing out it was just the babagoo, it knew what to do.

It was the fuse of that life. And the sperm, knowing what to do, those two mingled and doubled the activities going on in them and formed the little embryo, the little fetus, which is what you are today. What were you doing about it then? Nothing at all. And what are you doing about it now? Nothing at all. But it's happening. Happens all along. So, parents' energy plays around and forms, patterns, shapes, and forms. Things break down and go away and more patterns, shapes, and forms. What they call in some of the scriptures the sport of Shiva or the dance of Shakti, Shiva, Shakti. Shiva's aesthetic aspect, the godliness, if you like.

Shakti, his consort, his partner. So, Shiva's aesthetic aspect, Shakti vibrates and dances and forms the world. And what's that vibration? Energy. So, it's all intelligence energy that's vibrating, patterns, shaping, forming. that's what you are, what I am and what everything is. Now we came out of that space, where do you go when you die? Well life goes out of that pattern you call the body. Where does it go? Well if you're lucky your parents might buy a coffin, put you in the coffin you'll die in that, you'll be in that and you'll start to rot in that. Or they'll put you in the fire and burn you.

And when they say ashes to ashes, dust to dust. Well that's where you go. And what happens to those ashes and dust when they break down even further, they'll break down into space again. So there it goes. And out of that space small pattern shapes and forms will form but it won't be reincarnation because you'll never get the same pattern out of it again. Reincarnation is another myth we believe. But refresh a new life which is constantly happening. And that's what is necessary. It was necessary for this pattern. It mightn't be for yours. But within that conceptual functioning the way it was, with all the unhappiness and things were going on causing a great amount of misery and happiness.

When the recognition went at dawn on me that to recognise and look into and find the true nature. And as Banki, a Zen monk in the 16th century, he called it the unborn Buddha mind. And he made the statement then that everything is perfectly resolved in the unborn. Why exchange the unborn for thought? And there it is. We've learnt thought. We've taken on these thoughts and believed them to be real. And look at the strife we get ourselves into. If you're not exchanging it for thought, leaving it as it is, the thoughts will appear, be acted on and not out of it. But the energy of belief that they're this, that and the other won't go into them.

So, that's what needs to happen. We need to look in these things and investigate. See that everything is that essence. And I'm running out of words at the moment. And that'll do. Anyway. Thank you, Bob. Thank you, Bob. Hey. Thank you, Bob. No. Kat, where is she? She's here. She's here. It's okay. Sorry. Yeah, we have about 25 to 30 people with us. And we have a lot of welcoming messages and thank-you messages, but not much of a questions or contributions again. But, so, we start from inviting you guys to actually bring up anything that's stood out. You want to start? Nina. Sorry, one second.

Yeah, we'll just get the mic. Sorry, it's got a big camera. Someone. Thank you. Bob, you mentioning how got my thoughts started going. Why don't I get the listener in so I can hear you? Yeah. Bob, you... Is it turned on? It's really just to record. Oh, is that it? Oh, sorry. Bob, you mentioning how the word got my thought process going. And the word fear came into it for me. And the word indoctrination when I investigated. But I found a funny side to it. You said something about your parents putting you in a coffin and you get burnt. And I thought when I investigated, maybe it's that that's creating something within me.

I just sort of saw another side to it when you mentioned if your parents put you in a coffin or you're in a coffin and the burning sensation of some people take that. They do that when people go. I don't know. It was just an investigation. And I sort of saw the ridiculous and funny side of it. Instead of being fearful of burning in hell like a nun told me I would if I didn't behave myself. I got taken to the burner at the school. And she said, if you don't behave, you're going to burn in hell like that. So it's really great. I sort of cleared that stupidity, that indoctrination through you mentioning it.

It's just nothing overly serious but interesting, I thought. About four days ago I was trying to remember my most favourite quote by the Shakespeare of non-duality, Wei Wu Wei. And you said it, Bob. Which one was it? I've forgotten it again. I just had it just then. Why, why, why, what? No, why would I? No, no, it's... Everything you do, everything you think is for yourself. Yeah, everything you say, why are you so unhappy? Because everything you say, do or think is for yourself. And there isn't one. And before I came to Australia, I was tramping in the New Zealand mountains for like three or four months doing two-week tramps at a time plus.

And in every hut book I'd write that on the inside cover of the hut book just to blow out the people that were tramping. My next favourite one... Vandal. Yeah. Something cosmic when you're out in the bush. The other one is my favourite is, what is your problem? Mistaken identity. Simple. Simple. That's beautiful. His brain melting, his stuff is fantastic. Yeah, so we only have love and blessings from different parts of the world. And Tasha, wonderful. I've always got something to say. Wonderful. Thank you. Um... This is kind of really weird and cool. During the week I was meditating quite heavily or deeply. And, um...

What happened was... The localisation of Tasha left the building. And then there was just maybe... Maybe it was just presence? I'm not sure. There was just... Awareness. And it was quite nice. And then... The mind apparatus... Started being flooded with images, thoughts, feelings, sensations... That had absolutely nothing to do with Tasha. Her history. Her normal thought patterns. It was just so foreign. It was like as if... There was a foreign movie or something... Placed in the thinking apparatus. And... Obviously there was some form of Tasha there. Because it was like as if this thinkingness was... I don't know. Up in the sky. Outside of the localised brain area.

And it was like... That's fucking weird, man. Like that that would happen. But I think the... The takeaway is that... There was no body. No identification. There was just a thinking apparatus. Thinking. And its usual patterning was not there. Then there was the viewing of... Almost like overlapping thoughts, memories, sensations, images. Tasha-isms. And they almost like came in a collage. Overlapped in a collage. And the more that that consolidated and became more localised. The more me came back. And the less... Maybe it's boundlessness was there. I don't really know the right words. But it was kind of nice. And then... So for the next few days there was extreme anxiety.

Like extreme anxiety. As well as... No desires and peace. And I don't know how you can have extreme anxiety and peace at the same time. Because neurologically and physiologically they're actually not possible. Because you're calling on two different parts of the nervous system. So I don't even know how to make sense of that. Like I really don't care either. Anyway, I'm just rambling. But I just thought I'd share that because it was weird. And I don't really know what that is. But it was nice. Not taking part with your nervous system. You're going beyond that. You're going into the absolute itself. When you couldn't relate it to anything, you know.

But then you bring it back and sort of finite it up into the believed in self-centre. And lose sight of it. But you're in touch with the absolute when you open up to it. Because you don't know what your next thought is going to be. But a thought will come up. Where does it come from? Everywhere. Yeah, it comes from the space. Like it was not in the head. All our thoughts are not in the head, which we believe is healthy. Not in the body. You have a head the size of this room or bigger. Yeah, go for it. Thank you. It's interesting because as more of the overlapping thoughts that form Tarsha, as more of Tarsha-ism became more localised, physiologically there was a sense of feeling a bit seasick.

Like I wanted to vomit a little bit. And it's like, oh no, this is not good. Being a human is actually not fun. It's like the... Yeah. I don't know. It was just nothing. And that was good. And then, yeah, then when... Yeah, then the conflict. I understand where you came from. Yeah. I don't know if you've answered the question to me. Yeah, the conflict of the two. Yeah. Anyway. I would like to be there more often. Bye. I haven't been here for a number of weeks. And I think what I'd like to refer to Bob Spiel as, it feels like it's the great reminder of what I am.

And what I am here is recognising what I am through this message. Like it hears it and it takes over a lot more. And it deepens and glows more. And it's just content and it doesn't need anything. So... And I'm noticing the thinking that comes up is the personalisation of the thinking is the problem. Like it's taking that thinking to be personal and mine. And that's the tricky thing because it can be so... It's such an amazing disguise in the thinking. But, yeah, just to see any thoughts at all aren't what I am. But that little me, it's never happy. It's always shitty. It's always trying to rip into itself.

It's always trying to, you know, fight and like need to get this, need to get that. You haven't done that good enough, blah, blah, blah. So I'm just seeing that voice as not... It's not personal. It's not me. It's just there. And, yeah, the more I come here and this thing grows, the more that gets seen through a lot easier every time it comes up. I was just going to add, Tash, get used to it. Because when you hit that place where you abide in the nothingness, SHIT still happens because that's your personality mechanism and how it perceives the 3D world that you're in. And it's discombobulating.

So it doesn't stop. That dichotomy is always there. I am the nothingness attached to a Jason guy. Jason guy that bits of me I don't like. Bits of me lots of people don't like. And is the divinity here at the same time? So, for instance, yesterday I was in a situation where I was around someone who's a bit unhinged, potentially violent. I was still blissed off my face while aspects of me were absolutely bleep, bleep, bleep, angry. But the energy was cranking. Like it is now. And that becomes the dichotomy. What is your problem? Mistake and identity. So who are you identified as? Tash or nothing?

Nothing. That establishes the nothing. You'll still have Tash. And Tash will still need to have a good strong ego because if she doesn't she'll either end up in a padded cell or she'll turn into a cult master and do stuff that's boundary violating. So it's weird. Don't ever get you won't ever get used to it but you become accustomed to it. Thank you. There is one way of presenting it and if it resonates beautiful use it take it. Another way of presenting it is ultimately realizing that there isn't anyone there to identify a small self medium self big self subconscious subconscious super conscious God nothing there isn't anyone here who would require any identity just finding because as a totality yes all those voices narrative commentary all are present as a totality also that blank empty screen is present and it doesn't have qualities and it doesn't have desires and it isn't really a job to disidentify from the personality and identify as a screen because who would be doing that?

There is a place already to relax into where no identification is required whatsoever that's that resting place in which whatever shows up whether there is a nasty narrative pleasant narrative whether there is a nausea or whatever shows up is just whatever shows up on the screen a screen doesn't care it doesn't have preference personality will of course the body will always be wired for pleasure above pain the mind will always be complaining because that's its job I love when Adrian was saying that you know when you find that thinking that habitual commentary being just a function completely impersonal that's what it does because that's how it achieves the so-called improvement that's how it seeks the survival how it facilitates finding the most comfortable option for the whole vehicle and without the vehicle the so-called awareness which doesn't even it does or it doesn't or it both it can't experience itself it can't express itself so the vehicle in a way like what was expressing which that potentiality created for itself grew it from a little fetus or a little cell to be able to see and hear otherwise it can't well it can through other vehicles but even that story is a little far-fetched because it creates the time that that was a time through which that has been happening while it is just a back story which we are seeing in that moment of unfolding but either way if there is a landing place within that sphere of awareness where there is no need to identify as anything and whatever shows up whether there is a personality whether it is anxiety whether it is a pleasure it is completely impersonal it is just the content of space and there is no one who needs to shift from here to there well that is the ultimate freedom but if there is a situation in which ok I will talk myself into oh I am space now I am not a little me I am the big me and it feels a little bit happier well that is how life unfolds that is perfect too whatever works from this sort of gymnastic there is also a space in which it is being perceived in which you can see that shift from small identity to big identity or from self-loathing to self-acceptance or any of those tricks psychological tricks that happen in the different therapies there is a space in which all those movements are happening and that you are ultimately but yeah whichever way the life plays out I need that yeah I love that that is a lovely description and also Bob's pointer about everything appears to be happening but it is happening within intelligent space an intelligent knowing which nothing can appear without boundaries and the boundaries are happening within spaciousness yes against spaciousness it is like a shadow play so beautiful pointer that one that really hit me today thank you so much Bob and Kat and everyone thanks Bob and Kat thanks Bob and Kat I know that resting place that you know you speak of and I can be in that a lot of the time yet there's this the thing that that I'm just trying to formulate it because there's been a lot of lots a lot of shiftings been happening especially since I've been coming to see you in the last you know months but it seems to be even more so recently there's been some let's put it there's a revelation to me about family and other other things like that that have brought up certain conflicts in me which pull me out of that space and especially with my father but you know within the the family there's been things that have come up and it also brings back historical things in me and about my own view of myself and and understandings and I find it really hard to to come out of that I guess anger and resentment towards myself and situations I can see that that's not the place I've got a sense of you know the being pulled out of sorry or pulled into thought and the various emotions and things that are going on I get glimpses of the spaces in between that where there is you know separation or that that awareness yet like over the last few days I've found it incredibly difficult to pull back from the the the turmoil so I don't even know where I'm going with that but yes I can see the difference I can see that that's not that's not essentially me and it's happening in space but the the effects of that are really quite powerful and ongoing so I don't even know what the question is but just the just the statement of like yeah it seems I just got to stay with it I guess I guess that's the only thing is just sit in that awareness of whatever's going on allow it to come and just sit with it and see where that takes me I guess so yeah but being here and hearing everyone's experiences allows me to see that difference anyway that I don't just relate to the functioning of the emotional space or I can see that it's happening in a broader context let's put that way that's all yeah that's that's beautiful and I'm sorry that you're going through that because of course you know any sense of any sense of discomfort whether it's a physical pain or there's emotional pain of course it's undesirable and all the forces of that body-mind vehicle will be resisting that sort of a thing but again there is a resting place in which the ultimate freedom is regardless whether there is a physical pain or there is an emotional pain or there is a resentment showing up whatever is showing up is just what life is experiencing at this moment and to not wishing it away actually to find a place in which the wishing it away is part of the landscape and yeah the resentment is here the wish to be loving and not resenting is here and I am the space for both of them to be until they are not because resisting the feeling will actually just you know it's like pulling the oil on the fire it will keep it growing resistance is the negative attention but still the attention that fuels it finding that soft spot in which oh yeah okay there is a pain physical emotional whatever can I just add one more to it just I'm also noticing that so my immediate person in front of me at the moment is my father and he's you know he's one of my longest relationships obviously and there's a lot of fear in him about his situation about getting close to he's not well and he's fearful of pretty much losing everything which is true like he will lose everything he knows everything he's been his physical side of things he's you know he's constantly clinging to the stuff around him the items everything that he's done in life to get you know the house the pictures the furniture and it's been really grating on me as well but at the same time I realise there's some of that fear in me too about letting go of things and my constructs of who and what I am and constructs of what my life is you know and it's not the things but there's an element that still relates to that because that's the me mine stuff but I've found that he's like such strong grip on it is causing him so much pain so much anger resentment and everything and I can see that that's also partly in me as well so I guess by seeing what he's going through I'm seeing what I'm going through and that's been hard but helpful and it's been there's been a lot of stuff that's been brought up with that but it's also allowing me to I guess see it and process it now rather than at any other time but but yeah but it's just I can see how much of what he's going through I'm picking up at the moment as well but it's not a bad thing it's just is and it's it's it's just yeah it's just a lot of processing going on but yeah anyway isn't it incredible to actually be able to see how the suffering is going to start yeah yeah yeah go on go on oh yeah whoever yeah I was um relating to Timo a little bit and I was thinking should I say something or not oh and then you spoke about this and then I thought oh I I came up also with I don't even know how it all happened but you spoke about something and then I thought um yeah like there's also stuff happening with me as well and um looking at in the the thought patterns of concepts let's say or um ideas of relationship situations you would like to have differently and discuss about it and so a lot of disappointment feeling came up and now by last two days sort of reflecting on ah I see um seeing the disappointment of feeling happened so many times that that that I realized so also because of disappointment anger pattern came up frustration patterns and then further on it came to a point where it gets more quiet and let's say separating no not sure what the separating is from the idea of the concept but physically I was like separating as well and then of course the disappointment and then I thought oh I'm finally there but it's hard to get to the sadness like to actually cry because then after that it feels more clear and more I say myself in that sense even if I'm talking about this but it came more clear and feels more comfortable um and uh I got much more clear on things because of the situation about myself what I need let's say for example their situations what I complained about that is noisy more more like conflicts around me happening then I was like oh what's that about me ah I like it more sometimes quiet I like it relaxing not all the time but I can see then oh what I what is let's say the body needs or me need of these sort of topics about myself and then I noticing all the positive things about ah this is what I like and then I start thinking about all what I like or what I looking for and the more I thought about it the more happier I got and then I was more excited about it and I had to share it with people so all this happens so like there's so much happening so it's really nice and then um I noticing then after I got happy I was like oh what is this now oh it's just the thoughts other thoughts thinking about like you know complaining and then the thoughts happening that and that that that thought make your emotion then as well so I got the noticing that oh that's happening again and and so when I was here I also it also thought about that separating as an idea was causing pain but then I realizing I'm physically already separating more already because of the noise and because of this I'm not feeling comfortable around so the physical separation around the noise factor being high was already separating me automatically and the rest was just the ideas then having concepts what that separation then look like might make you feel more painful but it's very complex but also at the same times it feels quite interesting and clear as well when I look at that you know you walk away from very loud noise because it feels more nicer to be quiet and calmer so but then sitting here with Bob and listen to it I everything looked different and felt different and I don't even know it's positive or negative and it felt like when I looked at Bob's face and then it looks like oh I have him before it looks very different it's like was I can't relate to anything like that um of course I felt more energy as well than sitting here and it felt sort of more kind of numb like I couldn't get excited about anything and I thought oh is it like that's the way I see it without the thought of thinking more um I can't say more to that but it it's just all my experience or the experience I'm having um so sometimes I don't know what I should share or not and sometimes things happening and since you spoke it somehow it's just like oh yeah it just happens that way so I think yeah that's it um so I think it's really interesting that we get told it's non-conceptual awareness and we spend all this time concentrating and focusing on what the mind is saying doing etc and it's like I think I've watched the mind now for so many years after you know first hearing Bob when he told me you know you're not the body you're not the mind and like for me that was the most liberating thing I'd ever heard because I thought this head I can't control it I can't do anything to stop feeling depressed and then I became apathetic and it was actually delightful to be apathetic instead of depressed you know because at least I wasn't giving a about things now you know because I wasn't doing it so I kind of let it go and let it do itself um and so and and the more I've watched the mind the more I've realized how unreliable it is it's it's not something you can rely on it's not something it's always trying to come up with a definitive explanation of what you are what life is who you are what you believe in and it's constantly changing there's nothing constant about it you can't it can't come up with anything definitive you can't rely on it and we get told that that um heaven is within but we don't see it all right so and yet we keep looking outside we keep looking at who's doing what to who and when and what I own and what I don't own and all the focus when you're thinking is out there it's it's past present it but it's out there even bodily even experientially when you're thinking you're actually leaping out of your body you know if you if you instead of looking out all the time just turn in just look in just look in keep your focus inward all the time don't don't as soon as you because because you're already leaping out when you're thinking and you focus even try it right now if you if you shift your focus from the thinking and and your focus out there and just turn your focus inward you're already having a completely different immediately different experience of life it's a completely different way of living you know and I know it's so it's fine to say oh the mind might think this and the mind might think that stuff the mind and what the mind is thinking we're always going out there and we think it's okay if it thinks this oh yeah now it's thinking that oh yeah now it's thinking that it's all happening in this no stuff it it's not it's not something to concentrate on it's like you you you you you it's like this iceberg and you you're focusing on this aspect of the iceberg the thought and and you're totally ignoring the the the enormity of what is you right what is you it's like it's like like bob says if you put a magnifying glass at a point and and it's focused there it's going to burn it's going to burn right that's exactly what thinking does it burns it burns you and it's totally conditioned i mean the way i think is based on everything every bit of input the language that i've learned because i've got the words like so for example in germany there's a word and i don't even always forget what the word is but there's a word that where you enjoy other people's misery there you go i mean to have that concept gives you the idea to have that that feeling and that thought you see it's almost like language and words give you give you the context that you can think within right so there's actually there's no validity in thinking i'm not saying it's not functional it works we need to talk and we need to communicate it's happening that's how it's happening but to give our complete focus the way we do on on thinking is is our mistake we need to turn in and and keep the focus that way not out that way and even that even right now you do that and it completely changes your experience and to stay in that internal focus and and and that is so much more peaceful than what i've got whether i'm going to work tomorrow you know whether i can pay the mortgage whether i all that all that that stuff it's just and you have no control of it either you can say i'm going to put the money aside this week to pay for this and then you don't right so you can think all you like and what happens happens so if you just sit back relax it's a different experience it's a it's a even bodily it's a different experience to be turned inward and to keep that inward focus just keep it keep it there don't give don't give energy to to thinking that is completely unreliable beautiful that's beautiful and don't mistake it by thinking about me that this is the internal focus thinking about me is equally external thought that was beautiful that was just a wonderful summary so thinking about what i'm feeling what i'm experiencing is equally going out there and creating the images go to the non-conceptual to the sense of presence which is completely beyond any concepts or any boundaries any limitations and i see uh you have the mic and i just my appreciation for being here is profound as bob was speaking um tears were were flowing and uh it was it just it just was it just is and um um there was an awareness of of thoughts that wanted to come up around that but they didn't hang around and for for the perceived person of ariel this is quite a vulnerable situation for me to be seen um but uh yeah i just wanted to to express my appreciation for for all of you um for just being in this space um it's it's it's a good it's beautiful thank you thank you thank you both again thank you yeah thank you thank you for your courage thank you ariel that's yeah that is beautiful and it's yeah and i have a couple of things that uh we have our community adding to the to the mix uh laura says i'm finding here that i'm noticing more that when the dialogue starts i am more often able to simply say ah the story it is wonderful when that now occurs and gilbert says all movement appears upon stillness being is wordless be quiet and watch the mind be conscious of the consciousness beautiful and giotti says very grateful to be part of this discussion yeah thank you everyone for being part of this and laura says that was when arety was saying that's great thanks and tanya uh thank you so much for the reminder not to focus on the thoughts concepts much needed today and oops and laura says you're beautiful it takes one to know one and i have it is a nice projection to have to see the beauty to see the joy to see the love and as joseph was saying you know how much easier it is when you are light and happy to notice the thoughts and when you are in the depth of the darkness well that's the trap uh yeah so see the projection uh there is a a message from the man who who is not on facebook he's he's watching us on youtube when there is an upload and that was a comment on on last uh week's a beautiful highlights from last week's uh spiel of both uh he says the highlight of what bob was saying along the night the line if one function from a standpoint other than the one that is in that is in conflict other if you other than the one other than just the one that's a conflict and leavingness is happening right now and he says bob is also mentioned the unborn mind the pure mind without a thought i would add to that with the arrival of thought the concepts of the muddied mind arises and he also says a little comment on bob saying go and try to leave five minutes and he just made a nice little poetic like a little sort of a image of it the man walked backwards down the street clutching at the impossible notion of turning turning back time each collision with the obstacle mirrored his inner strife frustration escalating with every bump amidst the chaos a stark truth emerged dwelling in the past only led to regret and turmoil and you can see how the whole thinking and i loved already what you highlighted about the language all the thinking is already a framework for communication it inspires certain way of expression it is already a past language is the past it's something that you refer to through the memory it's not fresh and new i mean it's necessary and it's wonderful but yes it is as he says dwelling in the past only left to regret and turmoil and another of bob's phrases that really touched his heart and i love that too and who doesn't the adornment of space everything is just the adornment of space you may not like it who is it that doesn't like it there's just not liking happening also being just an adornment of space like joseph was saying oh i like this i don't like this if you see it as just an adornment of space that commentary saying i like it it doesn't mean there is an eye with the preference of liking or not liking it's just the emotional wave of depreciation whatever flowing through the space there's no eye that like or dislikes although it's fair enough to say in the language preference for this body is vanilla over chocolate or the other way language is wonderful and he also remarked on my response to mitra when you are completely aware of your presence being an empty vacant field of pure knowing that is the awareness of no thing and he created a nice little picture called awareness of nothing as the woman hung the clothes on the line she noticed how each garment once hung seemed so completely separate in the breeze but then a realization struck her despite the apparent separateness of the clothes the line the pegs the breeze the hers and herself she realized they were all part of the unified hold hold whole this realization transcended the illusion of separateness leading to an awareness of nothing where distinctions and boundaries dissolved revealing the underlying unity and interconnectedness of everything in that simple act of hanging clothes she gleams a deeper truth a unity beyond words where each garment represented a thread in the intricate tapestry of life and this is a great invitation as you go along as you go alongside you just leave your life that every scene that is unfolding if that scene includes you cooking or washing the dishes this is still an adornment of space this is what is happening within that field of consciousness or knowing that you are and that includes the body performing the actions that is all one hole within that one hole it's not me doing this and this is separate because the body space all that no it is all one content or one let's say projection image on on one screen so i have a few more but we are over time so if anyone would like to add something before we go thank you thank you everyone for your contributions and life and thank you bob um for your relentless and continuous pointing and and and it's just amazing and it's always it's repetitive but it's absolutely spontaneous it's not there's nothing repetitive about it whatsoever whatsoever it's just brilliant magnificent thank you yeah and thank you everyone for spoiling us yes thank you bob and cat and for hanging out with us yeah thank you thank you