Sailor Bob Adamson, 2007. Truth's in that room

Might as well start. You ready David? Yeah. Three times a week at his home in an inner suburb of Melbourne Sailor Bob welcomes whoever turns up. This DVD is an edited version of my first evening session. Hi Catherine. Call it Advaita or non-duality but it's no more Advaita than what it is Dogchen, Christianity, Islam, Jewish or any other tradition or religion. Because ultimately they all point to the non-duality, the one without a second. And they put that without a second on because even the implication of one implies that there could be other than one. Some people arrive a bit late. Doesn't seem to worry Bob.

We say here right from the start that what you are seeking you already are. I'm not teaching you anything nor am I telling you anything. So I'm not speaking to anybody. I'm not speaking to any mind. I'm not speaking to that physical appearance in other words. The body mind organism. I'm speaking to that I am that I am. And that I am is the physical appearance of the body mind organism. I am is not the thought I am. It's to that sense of presence. The awareness of presence or the knowing that you are. The great knowledge or word is I am that. Thou art that.

This is that. That's that. Everything, the basic substratum of everything is what they call that. And it's that to which the pointing or the talking is coming from that to that. So in that there is no separation. That's why we say what you're seeking you already are. Each one of us knows I am. But it's not the thought I am that is the reality. It's what that I am is representing. That translation from the sense of presence or the intelligence awareness. The knowing that you are translates as the thought I am. And even while the translation is going on that thought is going on. That knowingness is there.

And if the thought finishes and another thought comes there is still that basic knowingness. If you look at it closely you'll see it's never changed. It's always there. We call it beingness. But again we're into concepts. Because for beingness to be there needs to be non-being. There can't be being without non-being. There can't be non-being without being. Cancel out both of those terms and we're A. Just like in the seeing. The thought I see comes in. I see this and I see that. But there can't be. And the thought I see becomes a pseudo-seer or the subject and I see the chair or the table or whatever concept we've got about what we're seeing becomes the object.

So there can't be the subject without the object. And there can't be the object without the subject. So again they cancel each other out. And that just leaves the basic seeing. And you realise there can't be a seer, can't be subjectivised without seeing. Nor can there be the seeing without seeing. So the seeing, what we call the seeing is the actual functioning that's happening right now. Is there anybody here who is not seeing? Anybody here who's not hearing? Anybody here who's not aware of being present? Well that presence of awareness is not with you. So it's not something that has to be attained or got.

You see it's obvious that without that nothing could be happening here at all. See how the stars are orbiting. Earth going around the sun for instance. Tides coming in and out. Seasons coming and going. How a tree will sprout from a seed or a blade of grass. How an insect will come out of a cocoon. How a larvae will stage, or some pupae stage into a moth or a butterfly with all its glorious colours. How the simple white and yolk and a pea fowl's egg can turn into all those brilliant colours. The sperm and the ovum coming together can form this human pattern with its ability to reason and its capacity for inventing and creating art, technology and all the rest of it.

Implies that this manifestation is suffused with an innate intelligence. Innately knowing. And that's the intelligence I'm talking about. That to me is what I mean by intelligence. And that intelligence is no thing that you can ever grasp. No thing that you can ever conceptualise. No thing that can be ever seen. And that natural state is what you really are. That natural function. The same as in nature. The same as all this manifestation is. Naturally aware. Self knowing. Self patterning. Self functioning. And that's why we say what you're seeking you already are. Because there's no body here who has ever been away from it. Ever could get away from it.

It is that one intelligence energy. Still one without a second. Appearing as thought, feeling, emotion and everything else. Every shape and form in this manifestation. Is that appearance. And we know that in our language because we call it a phenomenal universe. A universe made up of phenomena. Look in your dictionary and you'll see there's a definition of phenomena is that which appears to be. The opposite of phenomenon is numenum. The unmanifest. So there's a manifestation as I said before as a being and non-being and an unmanifest. And there couldn't be a manifest without manifestation. There couldn't be the manifestation without the unmanifest. But again cancel them both out and what's left is what you are.

So the definition of the unmanifest, numenum, is that which it is. So it's the unmanifest which is the reality. That which is. That which has no shape or form but you cannot get away from it, cannot negate it. You can't grasp it. By the same way you can't get away from it, you can't grasp it with a thought, with a concept, with an idea, with an image. So it's all constantly without the word, without the label. It's just all as it is. Always was, always will be. In reality nothing has ever happened. It's an uncreated manifestation. It only appears to be so. It means that there is a freedom from this bondage of self which never existed.

You're always free from it. But it wasn't realised. It was believed that I am this self. I am this separate entity. I am this me. That's no good, that's limited, that's got no self-esteem, that's unhappy or it's great, it's wonderful, it's the best in the world. Whatever concepts I've got about it, whatever images I've had, and added to that I thought and formed a mental picture or a mental image of what I believe myself to be. And that is what we call the self-centred or the ego. Because that's all it is. A mental picture, a mental image. Without any substance or any independent nature. And if you have a look at it closely you'll see that image is constantly changing.

Have you got the same image about yourself as you had five years ago, or a week ago, or a month ago, or when you were a little child. You've taken on things, people have said things that you've taken on and you've let things go and that image has constantly changed because of the taking on and letting go. It hasn't been something solid and substantial that's had any independent nature other than the concepts that have been formed by this erroneous belief. So in seeing that, this idea or erroneous belief in the separate entity has got nowhere to stand. It's got nowhere to stand when it's seen as false.

It's got nowhere to stand in independent nature. How can anything be referred to it with any belief? And this is what we've done all our lives. From the time we first started to reason. When the little child first reasoned this Johnny they're talking about, this is me. This is I. And as I say, thought being a vibration or a movement of any what vibrates always in the opposite. What's the opposite of me and I? Isn't it not me or not I? And that's the very first time he starts to reason when he looks out there where he's seeing everything prior to that just as it is.

He's now reasoning, this is not me. This is not I. So now there is no I and not I. And when that I or not I idea or sense comes upon him, comes with the sense of separation where it was never there before. And the sense of separation is insecurity and vulnerability. If you feel separate or isolated from something, you don't know it or don't understand or you think you don't know it or don't understand, then there's a sense of insecurity there. There's a sense of vulnerability. You don't know what it's likely to do. It's all relative to this image that I've got about myself.

I like this. I don't like this. I'm fearful of this. I'm angry about this. I'm resentful. I'm full of self pity. I'm guilty. I'm no good. All these images and ideas this reference point, everything is relative to that reference point. It's judged from there as good, bad, pleasant, playful, happy, sad. All based on past events and experiences. It's a dead image that we're always relative to. It's dead. Now how can something that's dead, that's got no livingness left in it, it's got to be recalled and remembered to give it any life in the actuality of the moment, which there's only life that we ever have.

How can we get a valid appearance from an invalid reference point? How can we get a valid understanding of anything from a dead, invalid reference point? It's just like pulling the bucket of water out of the river. The rivers flowed along and left that bucket of water behind. What happens to that bucket of water? It becomes stagnant and dead. And that's what we're continually doing. Always referring it to this dead image. So whenever we've got the idea we've got to get something, or do something, or be something, that comes from the belief that we haven't understood or not know it, or we are not complete already.

And in that belief in not completeness we'll be forever searching for completeness. And the Buddha's message and the message of all the other great traditions was that you can be free of this psychological suffering. It doesn't have to be that way. The ancients talked about the peace that passes all understanding. And people think they're talking about peace of mind. And they say I've got to get peace of mind. Not realising that nobody has ever got or ever will get peace of mind. Because the very nature of the mind is to vibrate. Is to function. The peace is when the mind is not. The mind is not when there's no concepts going.

And then without any concept what can you say about it? Can you say it's anything other than peaceful? Can you even say it's peaceful without a concept? It just is as it is. And that's why they call it the peace that passes all understanding. It cannot be understood or grasped with a concept. Or with the mind. And that's the natural state. And it's right where you are right now. And where you are is here. And here is always now. People say what about when I go outside? When you go outside you'll be here and now. Look at it closely and realise that there's never been anywhere at any time, any place, or anything at all that hasn't been here and now.

Have a look and see. That's all that needs to be done. Now some of you have looked and have grasped it, got a good understanding of it. And as I say if anything is not covered here other people will probably want to hear this video. And there's some good information that can come from each and every one of you. So don't hesitate to ask questions or say your piece. You've got to keep going for a long time yet. Have you read something to that Jim? I think you did very well Paul. It was staggering for me to having I heard you the first time and I got very uncomfortable because it was quite staggering that the thing that I'd relied on for as long as I could remember was the very cause of my problem basically.

That I was so uncomfortable. I tried to find wriggle room but there basically is no wriggle. That's what we say. It resonates with everybody because innately everybody knows it. Innately you've already known it but it's been covered over by the cloud of conceptualising and lost sight of it. But it's everybody's is that. It's not special to just the few. It's that knowingness itself which cannot be negated. It's recognising itself. So that spaceless timeless awareness, the way we explain it that way actually you can't actually say anything about it because it doesn't have a quality and it doesn't have a quantity. So you can't actually say as a mental construct or in words what it is.

It cannot be grasped by a mental construct either because and that's what we've continually tried to do ever since we began to read. We think we'll grasp it with a concept. But as Nisargadatta says in that video. You're bound to fail. You try to grasp it with a concept and you fail. Because you're bound to fail. Simply and purely. Simply because it can never be conceptualised. I'll give it to you in one sentence. It's non-conceptual awareness. Catherine. Well on that point I suppose I have looked and when I do look I see that there's something that is aware and yet I can't put any label to it because as soon as I do it's not that.

There's hearing, there's seeing there's like a knowingness but I can't really say it's any of those things. There's just something there. Call it life maybe but even that. And it's like the mind just is, it falls away because there's none of those things. It's like a mystery I suppose. A bit mysterious. Let's see what you said earlier. As soon as I look for it it's not that. That's right. You're doing what the ancients have done in some of those ancient texts. Nettie, nettie. Not this. Not this. You're doing it naturally. Yes. You're left with nothing. Nothing. No thing. Magnus. Like I, you know I've had the usual week of being seduced by the whole idea of me being separate in a world.

You know. And my experience of that has been depression. And yet I came along tonight. You know. So it's still this sort of, I don't know if it's just seeking or it's just going no no the truth's in that room. The reality here is that I still feel that I maybe haven't looked enough at that really fundamental question of saying look to see where this me is. You know I understand the theory and the intellectual approach there completely. Fortify a sense of separate-eyeness and you're going to be in trouble. It will magnify the suffering and pain. But there's no, seems no capacity to really see through that illusion of a separate self.

And therefore move to this less pain self. Do you understand what I'm saying? You understand it. You've seen that there's no I there. Haven't you? I think I have. You have. You have. Yeah. Alright. Now you go outside on a cloudy day and you can't see the sun. Now you know you might go along all day. You don't have to think that I'm not seeing the sun do you? You're just taking it as a cloudy day. But at any moment throughout that day would you have believed the sun had left the sky? No. No. Now the same thing with this. You've seen it clouded over with thought.

And thought's just like a cloud that's covering that natural self shining awareness. But you've had a taste of it. You know it's there. You know it's your basic essence. Clouds seemingly block it at times. Rays of light will shine through at times and give you glimpses of it. But know that that basic essence, what you are, has always and ever been what you are. It's never been left. No matter how thick the clouds may seem to be. So it's knowing the truth about it that you're free from the bondage of erroneous belief. And we use the metaphor of the blue sea, the water in a mirage, the sun in the cloud, and lots of other metaphors they use to try and point you to it.

I wonder if I really do know the truth though because it's in the past. I mean I've been in the past. I've been in the past. I wonder if I really do know the truth though because it's like it says something says, okay well then living in this awareness where's the joy? Because I'm not going to give up trying to get joy in life until I can see there's joy living in that awareness. It's like this weird kind of you know, show me the money or I'm not coming. He wants to try before you buy. Ask yourself what's wrong with right now if I don't think about it.

Yeah I did it a lot in the beginning. And you paused. You paused. Yeah. What could you say about that when the pause was paused? Could you say it was unjoyful? No. Could you say it was joyful? No. That's what bliss is. Yeah well a part of me wants to say that's not enough Paul. Stay with it long enough and the subtleness of it will become bliss. More noticeable. That means something to me. We get a glimpse of it and say well that's not enough. And immediately move back into the old track of trying to find the answer in the mind. The sensations will come up, highs, lows, always up low.

But that which is constant, that which is steady, stick with the subtle essence of it. And the sense of well-being will constantly and ever there. Uncaused. That's what I call the uncaused joy. It's not the opposite of sorrow. We get into the joy, sorrow, love, hate, all unpleasant, painful, mental conceptualisation and there the great sensations up and down and all of it. But we don't say the subtle, the uncaused love, the uncaused joy, the natural compassion. All these things that are there. The courage, the beauty, the love. We put those labels on it. We put the labels on it and we're likely to get into peer source with the very labelling.

Just sense these things. Know these things. Get the taste of them. It's a true nature. It's a natural state. It's there. And the very trying is the trap again. So the problem with any techniques, I mean, there's still an underlying belief that there's a me that's going to sort of detach from my thoughts to watch my thoughts. And it's just the same problem once removed. It's just the same problem all over again. But, you know, really, at its simplest, it's just, you know, when it comes to you, what's that, you know, I'm not feeling well, what's that old ball head saying on Tuesday and Thursday nights, oh yeah, he says, go looking for me.

And you just go looking for me. And, you know, what's wrong with right now but don't think about it. I mean, I can see that straight off. And so that in the end, you have what other people have naturally. Some other people have naturally. That they wear their identity like a loose garment. It's becoming very clear that what we see isn't at all isn't any more substantial. What we see isn't any more substantial than the beings that we took ourselves to be. All of that is up for grabs. It's just pure potential existing as concretized ideas. What I call effortless living. I wonder if so many things get done when there's...

I often wonder how. Yeah, it's all miraculous. As Bankey says, everything is perfectly resolved in the unborn. Yeah, no question. Why exchange the unborn for thought? That's what I love about coming here, Bob, is that you really, you point out the obviousness of, well, not so obvious but when you point it out, it becomes so obvious that it is only now and everything that's happening, as you say, is okay because it all just keeps passing. And unless you think about it, it's really not a problem. It's the amazing thing that's always there. As you say, it's always like that. It always is now. It always has been.

Always will be. I remember when I was a seaman, I went out to sea and I crossed the equator at any time. But never once did I have to get out and open the gate. And we went across and there were never any bumpers. We've got this idea now. If you get up in a spaceship and look down, they'll go and say can you see all the borders that are in between these notions? So much we've put beliefs and things on when you look for them, they're not there, you know. And then there's the belief that there's a doer there. It's bad. We've got a reference point to evaluate again.

And they're judged from there as good, bad, pleasant, playful, happy, sad or whatever they may be. But if you haven't got that reference point, where are they to be judged from? Well, they cancel each other out with the name. Can you live a moment ago? No, you can't. You can recall it. But you can't live a moment ago. In the moment. The only actuality you're giving it is what's... You're giving it at this moment in its recollection. Can you live a moment in the future? You can imagine it. But you can't live a moment in the future. So when's it actually happening? Now. Can you ever get away from now?

So it's not a matter of staying with it, really. We use that term. It's a matter of realising you can never get away from it, even if you try. Even in the very trying. That trying is happening right now. It's not a matter of staying with it, just seeing that no matter what you do, it is always this as it is. Could you say that seeing is just that natural intelligence? As it says in that Hinsing Ming, emptiness here, emptiness there, yet the infinite universe stands ever before your eyes. It doesn't mean to say that the universe disappears. It's empty. It's there. It's seemingly there.

It's not being seen because there's no seer. It's still standing. There's no difference because all boundaries have ceased. Taking the boundaries and limitations off. There's a great sense of gratefulness that happens. No matter what, I feel grateful. It's rather like a game. But you know, it's a game. It's a game. It's a game. It's a game. It's a game. You play. And then you end up here, or a place like this, where you say, if you really seriously sit down and listen, you'll stop playing the game. You know, it's like a sinkhole. The thing is, if you really sit down and listen, you'll see that there's no me that ever played the game.

If there's no me now, when was it ever so? You realise it never ever could have been. If it's not there now, when did it ever exist? It never ever did. You see that the so-called game has been expressed or played not by you, the entity, but by that essence, pattern shaped and formed, all this diversity, but never changed its true nature. It's only seemingly so. It's only seemingly so. The game goes on, but it gets much more fun. A root of honour. If you know there's nothing you can do, what are you concerned about? You must be happy if you're not concerned. Don't rush me, Bob.

I'm just getting used to this stuff. How many understandings are there? Two. Thanks very much. Thank you.