This transcript was made by speech-recognition software, so names and some words may be misheard. The recording is the original: watch on YouTube.
grossly uncomfortable chair I've ever sat on. So I've been sitting there like, oh, oh. And trying to be, I've been totally in the moment with this chair. Serves us better. But, and you know, like it was actually good because usually I sit here trying to dissect but I was not dissecting anything with my bum. And whether to move. I actually want this cushion. A woman I once heard say that for many years she was a spiritual doormat, right? And like, I get the thing of like living in the moment and you know, I can kind of even tell what your response is going to be to this.
But like, what do you do? Like, when do you do what needs to be done and when do you not? You know? Do you know what I mean? When did you take your last breath? Yeah, but. Yeah. Did you have to think about that? No, but I have to think about three kids and I have to think about, you know, like I have to think about kind of things that happen. Like if I had just sat there and went, oh. I breathe. Do you sit there and go, oh, the kid comes up and do something. What do you do? You take their fact of your action in, don't you?
Yeah. Have you planned it all out before, Ed, what I'm going to say to the three kids and how I'm going to live through the day? Or are you living spontaneously a lot of the time? The kid will do something. You might give them a backhand or do something. Yeah. There is quite a bit of routine and, you know. Yeah, well, if you're a dad, you've got to do your thing. But I just sometimes really, and then I kind of, like I find it hard to know when I have to actually kind of do some action stuff and when I just sit back and, you know, when I just kind of am a part of and when I actually have to be a part of.
And then sometimes it just comes really easily. Like, you know, school holidays I've just kind of felt like this total abandonment to what needs to be done and it's fine, you know. You get through it. Absolutely. You see, when I've had it, how I've got it, all the rest of it. Again, conceptualising the idea of what to do. Why don't you live spontaneously and see what comes up? Because... You don't trust it. Oh, no. I don't trust it. Well, I do. So some do. Like, but I... I just always think of that spiritual doormat. I don't get that. What's a spiritual doormat? Just kind of, oh, I'll take this on.
Oh, I'll take this on. Oh, I'll accept this. Oh, I'll be okay with this. Oh, you know. You mean being passive? This is part of the process. This is part of the next thing. You know, and it doesn't... Sometimes you don't have to. Yeah, but you see all that's happening to the believed in entity. I've got to do this. I've got to do that. What if there's no entity there? What are you going to do then? You're not relating it to an entity any more. I actually didn't think you'd have a response for that. Pardon? Yeah, no. I like... Yeah. She didn't think you'd have a response for that one.
That's the only response there is. Yeah. Came into being. What say did you have in that? You say, well, after I've grown this body and the womb, I'm going to be a spiritual doormat when I get out? Or did living just start happening and then you acquired all these ideas even about spirituality. Aren't they all acquired stuff or learned stuff? That people have told you, people have read, or your school and that's been educated too. And in the meantime, all this acquired stuff's been there. The living things are still going on. Growing your body, replacing cells, cells are dropping off. Growing your hair, your fingernails, digesting your food, breathing, your beating heart.
I'm not thinking about doing any of those things. But when the body's done, you're going to be a spiritual doormat. You've split up the thinking into I think, I, you know, there's a me that's got to work things out. Anyway, sit with that for a while. Hours of seed are much a bit better now.