Sailor Bob's team - non duality - omnipotence

Dave, we go around with our names. Dave. Moira. Tony. Mandy. Judith. Robin. Terry. Well, cut. Yeah, so you want to kick it off? No, no, no, please. Just kick it off. Sure. Let me get my head into gear. Yeah, thinking. Me and my silly jokes. Giving me false hopes like this. Are you going to kick it off? You are. False hopes. False hopes. Okay, so non-duality. One without the other. Or just one. It's an easy, easy way to remember. Whenever there is any sort of a distinction, like, oh, okay, this is what my ego does and this is what life does, or this is... This is going to be bullshit because it's only one.

So there is no separation that this part of... this has God done or life done. And this has the person done. Person can't do anything. Person has absolutely no power. So there's always only the one. Whatever is happening is the omnipotence. Is that one power that is doing it. One power is expressing through the pattern of the body as anger or slapping someone. That one power is expressing through the sun as the heat. The one power is expressing... As a digestion and the result of it. And so there is just one. So there is no need to actually analyze, go to the mind and try to distinguish what was me and what was not me, what was ego and what was the self, or what was heart and what was the head.

Because it's only always just that one power. So if we give credit where credit is due, means give no credit to the person whatsoever, then we're home. If I haven't done a thing, then I have no responsibility, no guilt, no shame, no problem. I'm all right. And if I'm all right, I don't have questions, I'm not seeking. If I'm not seeking, that's the home, that's the way where nothing's wrong anymore. So basically any idea that there is a separate self or person that has to strive to become better or has to strive to tune into the power of life or tune into love or the absolute or whatever, that is the idea that basically prevents me from resting in that uncontrived singularity, in that awareness of the One, and seeing and recognizing every action as the action of that One.

Every use of power, including lifting the arm or rising the buildings or revolving planets around the sun, is just that one power. As Jesus is saying it, recognize thee in all thy way. So if you recognize that every movement, every power is that one essence expressing through different patterns, there is no problem. The person who was wrong, who made you wrong, the boss that fired you, they're all just that one power. But that one power, one could say, is expressing through the means that are available. So if the conditioning of the body is to rape and bump and whatever, that's how that power fueling the body is going to be expressing.

If the conditioning of the planet is to move and have these forces, that's how the power, one power, is going to be expressing. Through the cat it's going to express as meowing, through the dog as barking, through the musician as music. So really assigning any credit to individual pattern, which is completely mechanical, which has formed through the conditioning in time. Of course in time this is what we use for pointing, because everything is happening right now. But if we recognize that one power expressing through everything, including mechanical patterns of character, including the pattern of seeking, now I'm seeking, I'm having questions, I'm feeling inferior, I'm not there yet, I'm not that yet, I feel that I'm limited, I'm not that.

This is just the mechanical pattern. What is making that pattern active is that one life, that one self, that omnipotence. So recognizing that one power even in the appearance and expression of the ego takes this thing out of the ego. Now I see the mental activity which is completely mechanical, which is conditioned, and I see life that is fueling it. And it seemingly seems like I'm talking about two things, the pattern and what fuels it. It's not two. The pattern is part of, it's almost like the wave is still the water, or the frequency is still the wave. So it is actually the one life expressing through the pattern and as the pattern.

And everything is a pattern. The thought pattern, the emotional reaction pattern, the behavior pattern, the pattern which is the body, it's a very complex thing. It's a set of patterns. So basically recognizing the one power in absolutely everything that is appearing, it just ends the search. It's nothing. If I know there is only one, and I see that only one in various forms, what could possibly be a problem? Is some forms maybe from the relative perspective more pleasant than the others? Some foods will be more tasty, than the others. Some behaviors will be more in tune with this particular pattern than the others. But it doesn't really make any difference.

Even that relative reaction or judgment is just another pattern coming up, is just another way that omnipotence expresses itself in a different forms. So even the egoic pattern of reaction to whatever the neutral appearance is, is also the omnipotence. Because there is nothing that is not it. Everything is it. Everything is that. It's already that. So from that standpoint, it's really not much more to say. It's... We could argue that maybe, yeah, all right, maybe there isn't one, maybe there is two. But then we go to a different philosophy. It's rather than debating the idea of oneness or the idea of non-duality, we could actually see, because we were conditioned to see the forms as separate.

We were conditioned to hear the sounds as separate. So the idea that is coming and saying that this is not separate, is actually the idea that is counteracting the idea of separation. So both those ideas, separation, non-separation, now cancel each other out. And we are left in the open mind, ready to inquire. Like, okay, I don't know. There is or there isn't. I don't know. Let's find out. Let's find out if there is really more than just that one. We could look at the being, the basic being of everything, and see if there is different being to one thing and the other. They exist. They do have being.

They are. Can I ever distinguish or say anything different from one being to the other? Or... All I know is that they exist. They have being. So I can't really go this way. How about the awareness? Like, I am aware of objects in consciousness. There is an awareness of being of every single thing. And again, can I really, without conceptualizing, thinking, and applying a set of beliefs, see the difference in my own knowing? Can I say that my knowing of the feeling is different than my knowing of the being? Or is it different than my knowing of the thought? Or my knowing of the form?

I can't. There is only knowing. So there is a being and there is knowing. And now, conceptually, we can segregate it, distinguish it, we can put it into different sort of groups, and we can name it like Adam and Eve in paradise. You know, God told them to name all the animals and make them into groups and all that. And then we can say, oh, this is a beautiful game, beautiful play. But this is a game coming on top of the basic awareness of being of everything. So knowing that the basic awareness of being, the being and the awareness of it, are just one, we can play with the content.

We can play with the duality. We can play with the appearance. But the truth beyond it is not gonna change. The truth that this is one life fueling it, that there is one being to all of it, and there is one awareness of that being to all of it. And same applies here. There is a being, sense of presence, sense of being in the body. And there is awareness of it also. There is awareness of that existence. And the awareness of the existence is the one thing that can't be denied. That's one thing that is so close and so near and so dear that this is the only thing worthy of trusting.

Because if I trust in any story that I put on the awareness of being, I'm already a believer. I can believe in non-separation or in separation of being, this or that and the other. But if I really wanna honestly investigate what's true without being a believer, without being a follower of a set of concepts, awareness of being is the only thing that can be known directly without learning, without being taught, without acquiring any concepts or ideas. So this is where we are. There is an awareness of being. And that's it. There is again not much more to say. Everything else is a belief. If anyone can think of something, of anything else than awareness of being that is not a belief, that is absolutely certain, please challenge me.

I'd love that. Something that is still and steady, that doesn't change. Something that is truth regardless, that is always there, just like the existence, the awareness of being. Whether I'm awake or whether I'm asleep. And we're probably not gonna find anything like it. It's just not there. It's just not there. So this is one thing that we can rest on and trust in. The awareness of being. And the omnipotence, which is recognizing the one power fueling and expressing and acting through everything. Omnipresence, which is presence of everything and the presence of awareness. And omniscience, which is pure awareness, which is knowing, knowing of being. So that's really all it is about.

I mean, gosh, everything else is just an assumption. The assumption that I'm separate, that I'm living in the body or I am the body. Assumption. Belief. If I want to acquire a belief and become a follower of that belief, yeah, fine. It's not very pleasurable. So is it a belief? Do people have a belief to go to therapy? Is that a belief, kind of? Do you know what I mean? Absolutely. They go to Medicaid. They go to Medicaid, their beliefs. Why would you need to go to the therapy if you didn't have a problem first? Yeah, so they've got a problem. So they go to therapy.

And their belief is the therapist is going to fix it. Yeah, that's one of the beliefs. Actually, the beliefs are so complex. And they are so, like everything, literally everything is a belief. I'm sort of hearing that. I don't think I've ever heard it before. I think it's been said a lot. I'm just saying, I'm just, something's registering now about the beliefs, what you're saying. Well, people go to a therapist to have their me's fixed. That's the only reason. That's a good way of putting it. That's the only reason a person would go to a therapist. To fix my me's. The me's I think I am.

Yeah. Well, therapists don't pull that all together, don't they? Don't they help them to tear apart the me? Some of them, if you've got a good one. Yeah, but that's the problem. That's the actual problem. Why? Getting involved in the me and tearing the me apart. Oh, yeah, I get that. I get that actually. I went to a therapist for many years. And then recently I popped into one to try and fix something. And she's trying, and then I'm just like, this is like shit. She said, why don't you do this? Who gives a fuck? I said, I don't know who the fuck's going to do what.

What both the therapist and the person seeing the therapist are trying to do is to fix an illusion. Yes, I think I sort of picked that, but I love the way you've worded it. I like the way you've articulated it. Yeah. Yeah, and I'm getting that, the belief thing. So many beliefs and there's layers and layers and layers upon all that. I know when I first came to Bob that what I was hoping he would be able to do when I first came to him was fix my me. Yes, I'm sure. And he used to say to me, it was a long time ago, but he used to say to me, look, we can spend the next year and the next thousand years peeling back the skin on an onion.

Yeah. Which is what therapists and psychologists do. They dig in. Yeah. And all they're doing is changing or attempting to change the belief system. But so... To another belief system. Yeah. So Bob, you said, you know, we can spend the next thousand years pulling back those layers on that onion. Yes. And we'll do that. And after a thousand years, we will never get to the core. Yeah. Even after a thousand years, we won't get to the core. Yeah. And Bobby's analogy, which is fantastic, he said, rather than peel back the layers of the onion, he said, just grab the plant out of the ground and pull the whole thing out by the roots and throw it away.

Okay. Which is, what that means is, get rid of the me. And he used to say to me, Terry's got to go. I like that. He used to say that to me all the time. Terry's got to go. And what that is, is that belief in terms of who I think Terry is. Yeah, I've got it. Because that's that pain of the mechanic coming and the story of there's me. This is how me should, you know, I had a problem with somebody the other day and how I reacted. And how me should have reacted. And so, you know, there's the story. Oh, that process? Yes.

That process will go on till the day you die. Yes. Yeah. If you stay with that process. No, I don't want to. It will go on until the day you die. And what it actually produces is, what's the word? Give me a sec. Oh, what's the word? When you're totally involved with yourself. Oh, self-centeredness? Self-obsession. Self-obsession. Isn't it? I felt that. I felt it. It is because what we're doing is we're constantly analyzing every little thing that we do, every little interaction that we're having with people and watching ourselves and... That's self-obsession. And what we're trying to do, what we're trying to do is get out of that.

Yeah. Yeah. But the only way you can get out of this, you've got to pull the whole thing out. Yeah. And throw it away. Which means you've got to go looking for that me identity. Is it actually a thing? Is it actually real? What is it? Like, what is this me? And, you know, and the first part of your inquiry, what you'll discover is that all the me... Look, the closest I was ever able to get when Bob used to ask me that, you know, who are you, Terry? What is that? You know, the closest I was ever able to get to it eventually was, shit, Bob, all I can say is I am memory.

That's all I could say is I am memory. Because if we wiped out my memory, there'd be no idea of me at all. True, true, true. Okay, good point. So the sum total of the me is all the experiences that this me has happened in the past and is the insanity. We take that, which is dead, gone, like totally gone. We take that and bring that into the present and call that me. What the fuck? Are you serious? That's the insanity. Wow. That's the actual insanity. I'm insane. Everyone is. I'm not lying. I'm not lying. I'm not lying. Yeah. Run it, well. I went to therapy 12 years ago.

Yeah. And it was either that or death. Yeah. And if I come to something like this, forget it. I mean, whatever. For sure. For sure. And that, I hate that camera. Oh my gosh. It doesn't work anyway. So, Anyway, but the thing is that, you know, because I, I went to therapy for a short time. That actually brought me to this. Totally. Because everything fell away because she was switched on. Yep. Yeah. Because I mean, you can find some good ones. There is no, there is no way I would say, Whoops a daisy. There's no way I would say what I just said to somebody outside of these rooms.

Yeah. Yeah. I wouldn't do it. Yeah. And I also, and I also know that even therapy, psychologists and that interaction that happens, is all a part of it. But I also agree with you that like, I know people that have been going to therapy for ever and ever. Yeah. And like big deal. And I agree that it just reinforces that in me. Yeah. I was just lucky. Yeah. But it can help you over a hump, can't it? Like a real difficulty. It helps me completely. Yeah. That just, because of what it does is, accidentally stumble across a bit of it. You know, ask, couple questions get asked.

Oh wow. And then a little bit of something disappears. And that, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, and that pops up two or three times over the next couple of days, and the relaxation elements felt again, you know, just a bit of relief. And that's it. You know. It's short and sweet, and it seems to be disappearing but that process, here anyway, seems to be just part of the, creating the space. Yeah. Yeah. And I guess sometimes you've got to go through blackness. Absolutely. Well, I think. Absolutely. Absolutely. You know, it gets too many faces. through to get some 100% you need a whack on the head sometimes that is a kick in the I went through the I went through the exact same thing I went through the exact same thing there were certain things that I got involved in whether it be therapy whether it be a 12-step program whether it be whatever that had I not gone through that process I wouldn't have arrived here no I know I know that I know that for a fact even even the 12-step program which I was a part of you know when I first entered into that program I had no absolutely I'm embarrassed to admit it but I was a kid I was young but had absolutely no idea what spirituality was or meant none what I used to attribute it to was oh that's just religion you know and religion is just for weak people that that was my understanding of it you know but as I stayed in that program and kind of you know grew in that program what it did and it's in the 11th step we saw it through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God what once I was there then I started seeking outside of the fellowship for what what is spirituality what is that and it took me down lots and lots and lots of different paths which kind of for me at the end of it kind of led nowhere I went no that's not it I was never able to cop to a belief I just something innately in me refused to just settle settle for a belief and it's just in me you know it's not truth is it yeah so what's always compelled me is people used to say you know do you believe in God I go me I want to know God I don't want to believe in God I want to know God and and of course people that don't relate to actually what I was saying used to look at me and think I had two heads what do you mean you want to know God but that's what was in me if I can't know God I'm not going to believe in one I'm just not you know and so all of you know all of that whole process eventually and I and it was interesting because and I'm sharing this story with uh cat and Bob on Sunday um I got to a point where I gave up on everything I gave up on the 12-step movement gave up on all the spiritual paths that I've walked down I just went no to everything which was kind of scary at the time because it kind of left me with nowhere to go and I didn't know also what to do but here's the interesting part is when I absolutely got to that point somebody in the fellowship said oh there's this guy that's going to be a guest speaker at a meeting you know and I went oh I'm so over listening to guest speakers over it done it I don't know how many times but I said to myself okay I'll go to this one last meeting and that's it that's it after that and I I meant it it was so in me that I I meant it I go to the meeting and who do you think's there as the guest speaker Bob and I sat there and I you know even though he was leaving it the language through the 12 steps yeah I heard something that I've never heard before and I didn't even know what it was but but things were registering in me and little lights started to go off and intuitively I knew that what he was saying for the first time I experienced that's it I don't even know what it is but that's it somehow that's it and then I just stuck to him like shit to a blanket a similar thing kind of happened to me as well but I was really really really ill and I was so distressed or whatever and um and the therapist I was just really angry when she said be curious about I thought you know if off about the curiosity anyway she just said I read a book she said and um the guy was um very very ill and it just reminded me of you and so I actually bought you know well I only read the first chapter of the book and I was like oh I'm going to go to the next chapter maybe not even the first chapter but something clicked it was a Zen book I feel and then that was it I think and then all the suffering just dropped I think it's not really and just accepted what was happening and that oh wow I hear it yeah yeah and I don't even know what it was they just all yeah you can't name it no but some yeah there's no name for it when it just drops it was good freedom I get it also one thing I wanted to add just because the therapy was mentioned and people often get the wrong impression that you know the non-duality suggests to stop the therapy stop the medication forget about it I even met the spiritual communities who refused to go to the dentist because they were taking seriously that they are not the body yeah yeah it's the thing is recognizing that this is the one life one power experiencing and expressing itself through us ever and us everything gives place for everything it gives place for the therapy gives appreciation to the psychology and different form of natural healings and all those things is the life Essence putting the attention and developing a beautiful systems of healing or systems even of beliefs that can help that because life is experiencing and expressing itself in so many versions there will be a versions of life where it wants to acquire the sickness and it wants to acquire the cure through the belief only the psychosomatic sickness and the belief based cure and this is to be seen as a beautiful dance also it is not to be discarded we are not superior because we refuse to believe this is one life it refuses belief in here and it doesn't in there but it is still the same life there is no superiority or inferiority in any of it it's all to be appreciated it's all to be loved as as for what it is the beautiful so if you find yourself being moved to go to the whatever the phantom healer or whatever yeah just just be just just be aware like we were speaking with Judith just be notice when you are awake you see the activity you see the activity of the mind you see the activity of the body you are the witness you are you're not even the witness but you are the knowingness of it then you are awake if there is no knowingness of it you totally identified with the movement with the pattern there's no problem but when you wake up ah that's what the body is moved to do that's what the body is moved to say that's what the body is moved to close someone you know slap someone whatever but if the awareness of it is there the power with which body usually unconsciously react it's not gonna be there anymore because part of that energy is actually in the watching so the the the the thing is going to take away and the pattern this is the way the only way that unconscious pattern can break the light of consciousness shining on it and it can't go unconscious it can't go mechanical anymore there's a psychological block in here that won't let this pattern go to the dentist because it's some some you know it's wrapped up in some kind of I can't know you silly silly silly girl self care something like that I know it was good there's some some kind of self care there's some some kind of self care something like that something to do with like if there's too much focus on one element of self care then you come something come and wake you from behind and do your own you know you'll be dead so there's some sort of bullshit happening it's just interesting waiting to see if like you know the low-income health care will be gone and the money from the folks will make the dentist think happen but the teeth are falling to bits totally they're falling out and everything that's perfect we'll see what happens yeah exactly this is this is again this is this is a very vital point that thank you for bringing it up because we have occasionally we have conversation with with people from other side of the world and they have a lot of questions okay ask non-dualist what should I eat okay and now curious I mean really you want to put your attention you want to spend your precious attention on nonsense like this or you want to put it on the awareness of being if you want to wake up I mean of course it is any74 vai falling partis kaos basha benefits slup this you know they have thousand little questions and oh should I throw away my books or should I go chase Kundalini or should I do this well you know depends what you are moved to do but if you really want to wake up don't waste that energy on all that little petty things wake up first and then see if you want to go into a into food or into the dentist or whatever I mean the less of the energy spent in thinking of what is not there because right now when she was speaking to us she wasn't eating she wasn't doing Kundalini exercises she wasn't talking about chakras or healing so thinking about what isn't there is precisely wasting that precious attention that could be spent and invested into resting on itself into being conscious of the consciousness so this little things yes but later are they really that important right now nope cool just move them aside if they're as Tony as you say when the teeth will be so urgent that they will naturally come on the top of priority abge without you thinking focusing speculating and just fine this is again this is the thing this is how the mind works mind is spontaneous moment-to-moment sinking is spontaneous moment-to-moment but justification is deliberate it is a beautiful pattern you know you do think and you have absolutely no idea why you did it but if someone asks you why you will come up with the story like this right away you will come up with the reverse story the same thing happens in hypnosis the same things happens with children that are being investigated for a past lives the mind comes up with the story right away this is the quality of that beautiful instrument that very very fast very efficient computer so just just look at it don't get engaged in it and focus put on the importance if it is important but I assume that people who are attracted to those type of meetings that they do put important importance where it belongs I mean if the if the ultimate truth or awareness of presence is on the top of the list yeah just keep the attention there it will flourish it will open up it will shine it will bring up that please what we're saying is especially what you said about you pull out the root of the thing that's coming back to everything that you're saying which is that we're all one yes everything is all out the root then then stop all the other stuff stop all the chatter you can't stop it you can't stop it you just see it as the mechanical process just see it as a CD record old record playing out don't pay attention to it just laugh at it yeah laugh at it well I don't know so it just some reaction will happen to it yeah it could be like just like I just had a situation um I just found out a couple of weeks ago that someone that I knew like 30 years ago had died right and um it was first relationship very sick whatever but what was really interesting is my new challenge I was just neutral about it but what was interesting is that a lot of memories arose next couple of days but they were just memories I wasn't engaged with it at all so they were just I don't know they were thoughts but there was no thinking about it if that makes sense so it was just yeah of course memories arose but there was it doesn't there was no engagement they were just you know which was interesting so I thought that's interesting to have the experience of this in that sort of situation get it what I'm saying yeah okay so there's a whole lot of stuff that goes on so you know what I do with that you know and there's a couple of people here such as you just observe it don't get involved in it and so okay yes so there's two things that are actually going on there one there's all the content of thoughts that just seem to be rattling on and this but there's another process going on there which we usually fail to see which is that there's also a story contained within that content of thoughts that you as Judith as a me exist you are here okay and then there's the other thing that I think is interesting is that there's a there's a certain element that I think is very important someone's been who made much of a difference and that is we can tell may be in which way that I see this and have to be careful with that because not so much careful but aware okay that initially what can happen is it'll still be Judith that's here watching all the thoughts and choosing or not choosing as to whether to get involved with them or let them go or drop them or shit the attention or whatever the case might be pulling the route a home is getting rid of Judith or shitting the attention that's what they're looking at they're that's there observing all that.

So to do that, and the only way you can do that is to inquire into who or what is Judith. And you will discover, just from pure observation yourself, that Judith is nothing but a whole lot of concepts, a whole lot of thoughts. I felt that as soon as you said it. As soon as you said it, something just went boom. Beautiful. I got it. Beautiful. For a second. That's okay. I don't know how long that's going to last. Look, you resonated before when I said to you that what I am here, what I think or believe I am here, is nothing but all the experiences and all the memories that I have in the past.

Right? Yes. Yes. You got that. Oh, totally. And you saw it. Yeah. Okay? Yeah. So that is what constructs Judith. Okay? And all it is are thoughts. They're just thoughts. Yeah. And if we, you know, one of the things that I say is, if I could tap you on the shoulder, because I've got this little magic wand here, and tap you on the shoulder, and the moment that I did that, all, and I mean all, of your past memory got wiped out. Like, yeah, but, yeah, but, stay with this, got completely wiped out. Yeah? Would Judith still be there? No. Are you sure about that?

Well, no, it's a belief. At the moment, I'd call it a belief then. What would be there? What would be left? Just the body. And? The being. The beingness. Hello. So that beingness is always there. It's always there. Right. Got it. Got it? Got it, got it, got it, got it. Right. And that's what makes this, the self-inquiry of this, a little difficult, because you come in here, or you get exposed to this, and, you know, what you hear is, Judith doesn't actually exist. Yeah, but I feel like I'm here. What do you mean I don't exist? Well, then I've had the argument, when I go over home, there isn't me.

Yeah, there's a presence. Yeah. There's a presence. There is a being. There's a me, I believe there is to be. Yeah, there is a being, isn't it? But there's the being. Yeah, and what the me does, it claims ownership of the beingness, and says, this is my beingness. Oh, yeah, right. This is my awareness. No, no, no. When I say there is a me, I know it's the bullshit me. But there's a me. You don't and do not deny and tell me I do not exist. I do, because there's this bullshit of the memory. There's this, I know it's there. Yeah, well, it's there, but it's just a story.

All it is is dialogue. It's just words. So it doesn't exist. It's words. It's words, sentences, sounds, and so on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like I said, if I could tap you on the shoulder and we could eliminate it all, you'd disappear. If I thought... I'm sorry, sorry. Yeah, yeah. Your notion of me-ness would completely disappear. However, you'd still be sitting here. Interesting. That is interesting. Yeah, I get it. So what is the me that stays, and what's the me that's gone? You said there is me. Yes, yes. But if you don't think any thoughts, you exist. That disappears. It disappears. Yeah, the thoughts disappear. The memories go.

But you still exist. I'm still the being. You don't really know. Yes, there is a beingness, and this is what you are. Beingness without the belief or thoughts that you are Judith or person or Australian or woman. That I should be kind, generous, not kind, nasty, confident. Yeah, whatever you are, whatever you should be, whatever you was, whatever you will be or would be or could be, you know. So if I'm not one minute, that's great. And if I'm confident and cocky, the next bad luck. And then if you'd wipe it off, all of it, all of the thoughts that you could ever possibly think about what you are, do you disappear?

No. You don't know what you are. But if you don't know what you are, doesn't mean you don't exist. No. Because you had this argument. Oh, yeah, but there is a me. I feel there is a me. I exist. Mm-hmm. Yes, you exist. But you are not what you think you are. No. You are not the bundle of thoughts in your head. You are the pure existence. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. That's the shortcut to it. That's not right. That's the root. The only problem anybody has ever had is the belief in the me. Mm-hmm. Now, as you say, when the me thoughts are gone, how many roots are left?

Zero. Yeah. They're gone. Mm-hmm. So that's the only thing, the only problem there's ever been is the belief in the personal self. Who is this me? We call it myself. Mm-hmm. We talk about, that's what the truth is. The one self that's appearing is everything, not a personal self. There never was a personal self. The belief in the personal self is the last thing to go unless it's questioned. Did you ever beat yourself up, Bob, if you were angry and then regretted it? Yes. Yeah? Yeah. Yeah. Many, many years. Yeah. Oh. Most of my life. Yeah. And have you stopped doing that? Yeah. Completely. So you get angry and you just look at it and you go, oh, I did get angry then, bad luck.

And if you make an apology, you make an apology. If you don't make an apology, you didn't make an apology. Purely spontaneous. Yeah. Oh, spontaneous. Bob is going to say something. Sorry. Say something, Bob. Yeah. Say something. Bob, sorry. She's gone now. We're going to go. Spontaneous. So that's the problem. Everybody's problem is the belief in the personal self, the me. And that's what we call my self. Who's the me or the my? That's an idea we've taken on board. There's no me or my. There's just the one self. And are you aware? Aware right now? Yep. It's self-aware, not personal. You're seeing right now?

Yep. It's self-seeing. You're knowing right now? It's self-knowing. You're looking on the path. You're looking for self-realization. Which self are you going to realize? The personal self ever realize? No. If any practice to the things you're doing will never get there because it's the me that's doing it. Take it all off and you realize it's that same self that's breathing it. Same self that's breathing your heart. It's the same self that's rolling the earth around the sun. So that sounds like there's a lot of forgiveness there. It's not even a need for it. I understand. I'm choosing a word. When you said before the meeting that you attacked a woman, you put a cloud, self did it.

You didn't. Self did it. The omnipresence did it. The life did it. Or God did it. You didn't do it. I'm so glad it wasn't me. How cool. You can't do anything. You are a bundle of thoughts. You have absolutely no power. Bundle of thoughts cannot do anything at all. So you drop the thoughts, and the roots are gone. Who are those things? It's the me. thoughts going to trouble so how long are they gonna last you're not giving you can't give them power life is playing who's doing it right question are you doing it know if you do it stop it that's right who's doing all those thoughts who's causing the daylight and dark to come about yeah the thing of the sauce the sauce the tomato sauce so the tomato sources causing all these thoughts absolutely absolutely so I can say that next time I have an argument with someone we'll get a bottle of tomato sauce and blame it on the sauce yeah always blame it on sauce blame it on sauce yeah you can look you can even test it Judith you can really really really easily test it is this me yeah it's creating and getting involved in the dialogue and interactions that I have with other people based on my thoughts and the dialogue that comes out of me and what comes out of them and so on and so forth yeah yeah is it me that's the creator of that now if it is you that's the creator of that and if you're still sitting in or I wish I hadn't said that or or or when I arrive at Sutton such a place I've got to remember not to say this or that or or whatever yeah that's the personalize me that's there right okay right now if you really think that you're so that all that is based on free will the notion of free will I have free will after all yeah yeah yeah yeah and you probably you know depends how close you get to this but at some point you will still feel like you have free will you just will ok now so everything that happens to you if anything that happens to another person who's having a our paukall that's been like this for decades and I think most of us buy it because we live in a world full of поэтому that's said and we haveaba façade I think most of you buy it because we need it yeah that's why you want to live a happy life ok so yeah so everything that happens to you yeah and everything that happens to another person you may not avoid awkward� loveni Anything that happens to another person based on what comes out of you, all of that stuff that's going on, if you had any choice over that at all, and I mean like any choice over that, just sit there for the next 10 minutes right now and think nothing.

Zip. What you'll discover, if you really look, shit, I can't actually do that. Now, if I'm responsible for what it is that floats through my ears, surely I would just choose, just choose to have nothing but blissful thoughts for the rest of my life. I would never have another critical thought about self or other. Indeed, if I could choose that, I would just choose to think, I'm in. Enlightened. It's all okay. And I would be that and become that. And we can't do that. We actually can't do that. So, those thoughts that float through your mind and the thoughts that also create your identity that float through your mind is completely impersonal.

It has nothing to do with you, whatsoever. I get it. All the stuff that goes on in you, seriously, might as well be going on in Dave. Yeah, I get it. It comes back to self obsession. And if it was going on in Dave, all the stuff that normally goes on for you, all of it, if you can imagine, somehow you're able to move it and pop it over there into Dave and it was all going on over there in Dave. Yeah. And all you were was the pure, witnessing of what was going on in David. Just the pure witnessing of that. There'd be nothing going on in you because you've popped it all over there.

So in that pure witnessing, knowing that it's now over there and it's not in here, how long do you think you'd be interested in it for? No. I'm serious. No, no, no, no. Good point. You wouldn't be interested. It's a good analogy. Not for very long. It's a good example. Why? Because it's not happening in here, it's happening over there. That's what's happening over there and there's nothing I can do about it and that's what's happening over there. Thank you, now I understand. So there is... I think the last few days I've been stuck in self obsession. Yeah. I knew it. So what I just did then was create...

The source was stuck. The source was... yeah. So what I just did then was create a distance between that that's aware, that beingness, and what I did was we took the thoughts, we popped it over there to create a distance. So peaceful. And in creating that distance, you get to see all that stuff just happens by itself. By itself. What you're saying to me right now makes me feel like I've just smoked a joint. Do you understand what I mean? I think if you... you know, it's just that whoosh. Beautiful. So I don't have to fix anything, I don't have to change anything, I don't have to rearrange anything.

Just let it be. Let it be. Let the movie happen. Yes. And don't take it personally. Yes. And at some point, at some point, you'll start to have a closer look. You start to have a closer look at, okay, I can see all that, I can see all that. All the content. It's pretty much the same kind of content that goes on for you. Oh. Yeah, constantly. And the content that would go on for someone else is their content. Sure. And it's pretty much, and it just keeps regurgitating itself. Sure. It just does. Sure. Yeah. So, there'll eventually come a time where there'll be a sense of something else other than the content that's being viewed, that's being witnessed.

Initially, it's great. Okay, I'm just going to sit there and I'm just going to watch that content. And there is a movement in that. And there's less of an effect and less of an impact that even happens in the body as a feeling or an energy or an emotion. But eventually, eventually, when you just see that and go, okay, I can see that, number one, I'm not creating any of that. And number two, all it is is just thoughts and words and concepts and sounds. And that's all it is. You know, all of that stuff is never the actual event that was experienced. It's all the noise.

It's just noise. All white noise. Beautiful. Okay. So, you eventually see that, but at some point, you'll start to, you'll become curious as to, okay, I see that and I get that. Who's watching it? What is it? What is it that's now become pretty acutely aware of that, that content? And it's that point that you'll start to turn, that's when the self-inquiry really starts. That stuff, seeing that stuff is just at least recognizing what you're not. Okay? And when you fully cognize what you're not, you'll still be left with, hmm, yep, got that, but I still feel like I'm here. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Now you go looking.

That's when you go looking. That's when you go looking. That's when you go looking. That's when you go looking. That's when you go looking. Okay? Who is this? Where is this? What is this? And it gets really focused because your attention's no longer on all the clutter. On all the- Which is the same as what you're talking about with the fist, the same thing. Yeah. But you were giving me a core, a hard example. Yeah. I understand. I understand. So it just happens by itself. And if you've had a couple of light bulbs go off to the moon, you know, you're going to be like, I'm going to be like, I'm going to be like, I'm going to be like, I'm going to be like, I'm going to be like, just on light, you know, fire, moving up and sending these bulbs go off tonight, especially in terms of just all the content.

Yeah. And learning to try and sit back from it and just witness it rather than wearing it. Yeah. Horrible wearing it. That's a lovely analogy with the wearing it, but I agree, I wear it. And then, so your shoulders hang. That's because it's too close. Mhm. That's why we, it's so close. Hm. I need to put it back over there. David? Yeah. Yeah. by itself anyway. You're not the chooser of any of that stuff. Okay, then the but, and I always do the but with Bob, and you mentioned responsibility a little bit, you know. That's the but for me all the time is, well, aren't I responsible for what happens?

No, not one skerry. Yeah, well... No, but part of the great intelligence, you will be responsible. Correct. You will pull the girl out of the way of the car, you know, or whatever. Or make an apology if you've been over the top. That's all part of the great... But it will spontaneously... It will spontaneously... Yes. Yes. It will happen spontaneously if it's meant to happen. Yes. So there is no responsibility because it will be taken care of. There's just no media that has to take responsibility. Exactly what Bob was explaining, the personal self doesn't exist. So personal responsibility would be the responsibility of personal self that doesn't exist.

Terry was showing you how personal self is just a bundle of... of memories. How the memories can hold responsibility. Memories are thoughts. They are just like programming the computer, the thoughts. They can't hold responsibility. Although there is life that you are, the pure existence, awareness of presence, and that has absolute, complete responsibility for the whole appearance, for the sun to shine, for the seasons to change, for whatever the other person does, for your response. Full responsibility. But the person is a fiction. It can't have responsibility. There is just dead mechanical pattern acting out. You as life are aware of the dead mechanical pattern. Who are you going to blame for the dead pattern?

Your mother, your grandmother, your great-grandmother who brought up your mother, the circumstances, the school, the teachers, the weather, the nationality. The pattern that formed, the response behavior pattern, has been formed through every single event, every millisecond, every second of your past life. The whole world contributed to the pattern to appear in that form. So if you want to blame, you can't blame the personal image of the self, the mask. You have to blame the whole world. You have to blame what happened 10,000 years ago. You have to blame the climate, the mosquitoes, everything. What your mother was eating when she was pregnant. Everything. You can't find the primary cause.

No. You cannot find the primary cause. Bob wants to... If you... Bob... Going to be a doctor... Not a doctor, but a doctor. And the thing is, just knowing, seeing it all happen by itself, is the it self, the personal self, so that it self is the I self. I-I. Not a tribute to a person. So everything is self, shining, self-real, self... All self occurring, if you like, you know? No personal self has ever done anything. And that's the belief we've taken on. And when you look at the belief, Is it real? That's okay. It's gone. It's past. How about now? Today? Tonight? No. Always.

How about now? That's all that matters. Right now. Wake up for now. If you don't have the personal self, that person who has attacked you, they also mechanical pattern that has been formed by the whole universe. So that's why I still love her. Absolutely. And something you've just woken up in me, I had kind of a confrontation with a mechanic. And I just, when you were all talking and everything, suddenly reminded me, I've been told again, whatever I said to him, he needed to hear. It was his part of life. So why am I, the source wanted me to come through me, what I said to him, and I'm trying to own it and be responsible for something that doesn't matter.

It's none of my business. You had no choice in what was going to come out of your mouth. Yeah, exactly. Well, I love that. I had no choice of what came out of my mouth, but yet I'm stirring it all up like I should own it better. I should have done better. Yeah. But also before you speak, if a thought also spontaneously arises in you, or I won't say that, that that wouldn't be fair or that wouldn't be right. Yeah, I hate that. But that's also spontaneous. Oh, okay. That's also got nothing to do with you. Oh, okay. Yeah, okay. And then we'll quickly step in there and go, oh, me better not do that or say that, oh, I'll withhold that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do you understand? I do. I do. I understand. Who else? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So you're saying that it's the mind that's the biggest problem, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that me that believes it's choosing to act or not act is that that you've got to try and find- There's the freedom, isn't there? Yeah. There's the freedom, the bondage of self. Yep. Mmm. Can I just get back to what? You've just brought me back to what Kat was saying right at the beginning about non-duality. Yeah. And it's a big ask. It's a big ask. You said, and the source wanted this to happen or whatever.

Yeah, yeah. And it's, yeah, it's a big ask. And then you say, I'm not going to do that. Yeah. And it's a big ask to stop separating the source from what I am. You know, it's the non-duality. This is the source, you know, the expression. You know, we are expressions. But it's a big ask after, I think Kat also said, we've had many, many years of just being training, of thinking of other, you know. And I still find myself, not that I stopped believing in God, you know, in my teens, you know, but there's still that other thing that comes in. And you're just talking about source, yeah.

I often get, yeah, I realise that, yes, source is something I often see as separate from me, you know. Yes, yes, yes. Even though, really, it was nice to hear Kat talking at the beginning that it just sort of brought it all together. This is it, you know, this is it, you know. Yeah, you're right. There are times when I think I'm separate. Oh, yeah, after a whole lifetime. It's huge. It's huge. I hear you. So Siri was having a conversation to another Siri, you know, you're a mechanic or Siri, you're talking to Siri. You don't really think Siri matters or anything that Siri says.

Oh, you just woke in Siri up. She says she does matter. Anything other than neutral, you know. That was gorgeous. Yeah, just neutral talking. It is, isn't it? I see it from that point of view. That's another good analogy. Yeah. Yeah. That was perfect. That was perfect. That was sweet. Bob, you have something. Just watch it as though it's going on. Oh, absolutely. And someone else. You want to say something, Bob? I'm giving it to Dave. Bob is going to say something. Yeah. When you're saying at the start, you're elaborating on the omnipotence. Omnipotence. Omnipotence for a bit. But it's three aspects. Omnipotence, omnipresence, and omniscience.

Omnipotence is the total power. Omnipresence is timeless. It's eternity. It's not the now. Now is just a spot in time, just like past. So you see, don't even be too concerned with the now. And omniscience is the intelligence that's recognizing all this. Recognizing everything. Recognize. And the omni means it's total. It's absolute. It's complete. It's all there is. Perfect. And when they finish it off, I'm saying, you are that. Total. There's no room for me or you or anyone else if it's omni. If it is, and using other words, if it is all just God. Source. Source. Yeah. Electricity. Yeah, that's her language. I don't like that word.

I don't use it very often, but it comes out sometimes. It's just the fridge. And we're the toaster. The sauce. Sauce. She uses like. What sauce? Tomato sauce? Yeah, I use tomato. But I love what Kat and I, Kat helped me one day, because I used to work in computers and stuff like that, but I loved it. You know, when she said the sauce is like the fridge and we're just little toasters and other, because you know, the main electricity, not the fridge, but the main electricity being the source. Yeah. And connected to it. Connected to the sources like the fridge and the toaster and I'm just the toaster and somebody else is just the fridge.

It'd be like all the light bulbs that are currently on the planet. Yeah. Or arguing and jostling for individuality. Far out. And somebody throws the switch and they're all gone. Yeah, and they all go. See, how brilliant's that? That's brilliant. How clear is that? Flick the switch and all those light bulbs go off. They're not even aware. Yeah. The light bulb's not even aware of the electricity. And that's the source. Absolutely. Not even aware. And as human beings, it's exactly the same. Yeah. Well, I did say to a girlfriend today, I was talking on the phone and I just said, you know, I'm experiencing being a human being and I don't like it.

It's not fun. You know, just experiencing, just watching. I was aware of this journey and you know, you've got to be out there and you're interacting with the world and it's complicated. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It feels complicated. That's just cause your means complicated. Yeah. Well, true. That's just a thought. That too. That too. That too. That too. Yeah, I agree. That's much closer. Thanks. True. True. True. True. True. True. Bob, you were going to say something? Sure. Want a word? Want a word? Sure. Sure. I saw you were going to say something. No, I was just having a drink.

Oh. You looked like it, look like it, sorry. Am I gorgeous? what's in other people's heads is just like latched onto. There's an automatic trigger. Oh, if I can solve the problem in the other people's heads, then the world will be safe for me. Like, they'll have resources, then I'll have resources and we'll be able to relax. And it's like, that's the automatic reaction. Whenever anyone says anything, there's this problem solving. It's just funny, the whole body just, you know, goes up and just jumps in and, you know, can feel some of the sensation now. And it's just funny, it's just, at the same time, neutrality's coming back into the picture from based on what people said tonight, so it's dissipating already.

But yeah, it's a funny pattern reaction. Hmm. Bob, you wanna say something? You know, if it's totality, how can you ever get away from it? And that's the problem. We believe that we are away from it, through our belief, when we took on the belief. And realize that you can't get away from it unless you're away from it. What must you settle back into? The beingness. Yeah. What is. Yeah. Okay, so then the judgment comes back in, doesn't it? I'm not as good as them, or, you do nothing. But see, Bob has touched upon it. The voices again. Is the omnipresence. Like, if you are the totality, you are the presence of every single form that is within your awareness.

You are the field of awareness. So if there is now one light bulb, it's saying that I'm brighter than the other light bulb. But you are the electricity. You're not the, you're not the. Oh, wake up. So now, Wake up, it's the light bulb. When you see the process, the movement of the mind of comparison, this is just the vibration. This is just the movement. This is another line of thinking. This is another thoughts, bundle of thoughts. You just be aware of the process. You see one light bulb, another light bulb, and you see the comparison going on. Bzzz. Bzzz. And you are the awareness of it.

You are the omniscience, which is the total knowingness, and omnipresence, which is the total beingness, and omnipotence, which is the total power. It's like the glass, the filament, the space, the everything just has the same, the source has the same liveness to it. It's just all, it's just the same kind of thing. It's the same neutrality right through it. And why would the toaster, what? When you said that the electricity analogy worked for you, why would the toaster want to be a fridge? I mean, it doesn't make sense. I know. There you go. So if there is a little story in the head of a toaster that I should be like this, I shouldn't be like that, the source, the electricity made the mistake and created me crippled.

That's interesting you've helped me there because as a child, I've always loved all the movies. I can't think of a name right now, but one of the movies where they've got the movie, I can't think of a name right now, but one of the movies where they've got the movie, they've got the little teapot and they're talking like people. And we project ourselves onto animals and objects and they must think and feel like we do. And it's starting to send me insane because it's just so, such a projection of what we think the me is, that that pot should feel the same or that animal should, they don't.

Yeah. And the teapot doesn't even know it exists and doesn't give a shit. Can't think of the movies, but you probably know the Disneyland stuff, like the Disney movies. Yeah. And the Disney movies and everything. And yeah, thank you. Yeah. No, I find that same thing bugs me too. You get it. I hate it when they put, you know, a human persona onto it. Yes. A inanimate object. Loved it as a child, but as I've started this process, do you know what I mean? That's not working for me anymore. It doesn't sit well. It's like, crap. I kind of do it for the reverse reason.

I've put, wrote short stories about rocks and stuff like that, but it was more to depersonalise humans, you know. And I think that's a good thing. I think that's a good thing. I think that's a good thing. I think that's a good thing. I think that's a good thing. I think that's a good thing. And so it does work for humans, you know, so they were describing humans in terms of oh, these really fast moving things and they do weird shit, you know. And somebody in New Zealand wrote this amazing book for beak of the moon and it's like everything from the perspective of a bird.

And so they might see like a, you know, two legged bird sitting on a four legged bird or something. And you know, the moon, the beak of the beak is, you know, the moon is a beak. Everything's done from the perspective of a bird. birdness and it just takes the you know that humanocentric whatever the phrase is out of it. So I tell you a little story because it just happened recently few hours ago I was visiting my very very dear friend who is 94 year old and she was sharing with me a little email that she got from her granddaughter celebrating a year of her baby which was a great granddaughter that Nola has year old great-granddaughter and she just what you're saying she assumed the perspective the mother the young mother of a baby she was expressing a gratitude for the process of bringing up that little baby and learning about it how that baby is learning about itself and she says don't take it don't make it wrong assumptions is very messy at times it's very tiring it takes endless patience to take out all the things that are in the baby and then you know you know you know you know all the sharp objects from the mouth of that they end up being put there all the time but she says the moment of like the little Rosie the girl is teaching her to look at the world completely selflessly like she's looking at her own palm it's like oh my god and dripping off and then taking a little leave then living in a bush in Vanuatu in a wild country where she is just watching chicks and pigs and other kids and the one year old, no assumptions, no conditioning, discovering with complete curiosity, widely open eyes and ears, nothing related just yet.

And this mother, God bless her heart, without any non-duality, she's so conscious and she's so alert and she's so open to learn from that baby. She's taking the most of it. So not only animate, unanimate objects, we are putting some human to play with perspectives. We love playing with perspectives. We love, we call it heart when we put ourselves in other people's shoes. We call it compassion when we assume the viewpoint of people. We crying when you see people who are poor, they are not crying. They're pretty happy because they don't know any better. We crying for people who live in the harem or are being abused.

We don't know. We love assuming perspectives. So how about assuming the perspective of a baby? How about assuming a perspective of someone who hasn't been conditioned to believe themselves to be a person and to believe themselves to be that set of memories? Or assuming a perspective of the birth, like Tony was saying. See what this, when there is not that much of a mental noise going on in the head, how simple the life is. How simple the observation of the functioning is and how delicious it is because it is all happening in the present moment. Nothing is missed out. The sounds are heard. The sights are seen.

The taste, the balance, the breathing, everything is included. Life is delicious, but we constantly distract ourselves from that beauty, from that magnificent dance, by thinking of what is not. What happened yesterday, what will happen tomorrow. That is not. That is what is not. We are attracted to imagination and memory, something that doesn't really exist in the realm of senses rather than in thinking. And that's beautiful too. My gosh, creative imagination is absolutely brilliant. But again, like Terry was saying, wearing it can be pretty painful. Using the imagination, creative imagination, thinking, planning, rather than being used by it. Being hijacked and kidnapped and completely gone in it.

Completely asleep in it. So that... From the perspective of a child, a model, you know, a toddler, well, there's no separation anyway. No, no. And that's fantastic. They have no idea. No idea what they are. They can't see the face. And if they actually accidentally do see the face, to about age of two, they can't even recognise, they can't even associate themselves with the reflection. There is this mirror test that they put on the baby, a piece of paint or something, and they see when the baby will actually realise, oh my gosh, this and this, and the body. Before that, there is no idea of being the body, of identifying with anything.

It's just pure awareness. It's just pure space watching and discovering its own self. We take the perspective of the space here before labelling starts up. Yeah. Which is full stop. There's another one for you. Yeah. Absolutely. I just read somewhere that some animals are starting to, they're not starting, recognise themselves. Dolphins can recognise themselves. Yeah, that's good. I did, I get that. I know, sorry. Yes, true, true. No, no, it's all good. It's all good. So, this really important what Kat was just saying. Really important. Okay? That will give you, that should give you a really clear understanding of what the me actually is. Mm-hmm.

Is there a me present in a six month old baby? With what she's saying, no. Why not? That's a good question. Okay. Yeah, but it's important because she was just telling you. Yeah, yeah. Well, no one's put any labels on them yet. There's no language. Yeah, yeah. There's no words. Yeah. There's no language. Yeah. At all. Yeah, okay. So, what is it that creates the me? What is it? Us. The people. Words. Oh, I'm sorry. Of course. Do you understand? I do, do, do. Yeah. So, prior to that, when the child hasn't learnt that. They've got no words. Yeah. They're just one. They're here. Oh, that's everything's about separation.

No idea of separation because there's no thought. They haven't learnt. Thoughts haven't been constructed yet. There's nothing words. In terms of me here and you there. I was listening to Bob tonight actually in the car and he was talking as he always does. The word is not the thing. The thing is the word. The thing is the word. The thing is the word. The thing is the word. The thing is the word. The thing is the word. The word is not the thing. The thing. The word is not the thing. The description. And something resonated with me and I'm getting, yeah, I get it. And the description is not the described.

Yeah. It's not. It's just a description of something. Yeah. It's not the actual. So, in terms of you. Yes. Who you believe yourself to be. Yes. It's all based on a description. Not the actual. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Bob has something. And how do you imagine. I think that's a good question. Is it a good question? I don't know. So, I could say that. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. How do you imagine? How do I imagine? Yes. How is the process happening of imagining? In the mind? Words. Yes. And the sagara tells you nothing can trouble you except in your own imagination, what you image in.

If you're not imaging in all these concepts, you'll never have a problem. Yes, so in that sense, words and mental images would be one and the same thing. You can represent it with... it depends whether you're predominantly auditory or visual or kinesthetic. But whether you form mental images or you hear words, you hear sounds, that's all mental processes. That's all the processor here in the computer working. That has nothing to do with the existence. I mean, it is one of the expressions of it, but it is not who you are. Isn't it interesting that I get to have this lovely meeting tonight before I leave in the morning?

Yes. Because I talked about fear. I've got a lot of fear. And the fear is the projection. I'm looking at the future. I haven't even done my one-hour drive. I'm looking at 15 hours from now, so that's crazy. And the other thing you were saying was fear. The other fear, I'm frightened about my trip. Previously in my life, I've never really been frightened about trips. I'm frightened because of other people's fears. It only just came to me. But... I've got all these stories of what other people are telling me. So I'll be fearful. Have you... Sorry. Yeah, go for it. I totally get what you're saying.

Completely. Not blaming. I'm not blaming. I'm just seeing now that I've taken that on board. Yes, no, I'm not. So, have you investigated what's underneath fear? Because normally, the base is fear. Yes. Everything is happening. I'm reacting or feeling the way I do or whatever because of fear. Have you investigated to see if there's actually anything underneath that? Not at the moment. Not lately. Try it. Try it. What's underneath the fear? Yeah. Why do you care? Why do you give a shit? Why are you concerned about fear? Why be concerned about that? I have no idea. Yeah, feel it. I know that I... This is kind of personalizing it, but if I'm ever safe...

Say, for example, I'm driving. And there's traffic. And I might get hassled for a second. I always say, and what does the absolute say about this? And the absolute doesn't give a stuff. So, I can have sex. That's pretty cool. That's brilliant. And it works all the time. I mean, I know it's personalizing it, but it's funny. No, sometimes we have to express. It's just a way of expressing. That was great. Yeah, that's great. Jude, if you didn't have a love... Yeah. If you didn't have a love for self... Yeah. You wouldn't be here today. You wouldn't be here today. You wouldn't be here today.

You wouldn't be here today. You wouldn't be here today. You wouldn't be here today. If you didn't have a love for self... Yeah. You wouldn't be concerned about fear. Wouldn't give a shit. Wouldn't matter. At all. Because it would all be taken care by the source. No, no, no, no. Sorry. You are afraid because you care. You're afraid because you care. You're afraid because you love. You love yourself. Yeah. I love not feeling fear. I love not experiencing fear. There's love. There's love underneath that. But we normally just go to fear and we get stuck there and then try and deal with that without recognizing that your primary love is to be.

It's your primary love. To enjoy the moments, whatever may come. Just to be. To be. Just to be. We love to be. I know this is what Bob's always saying. Yeah. Yes. Love to be. He's always telling me that. Good. Love not to experience fear. Yes. There's love underneath that. Don't get stuck in the fear. Get under it. You want to be safe. You want to be nourished. Nurtured. So there's a beautiful, which we don't recognize, there's a beautiful, innate, innate love that's there that we don't recognize because we're not taught to go any deeper than fear. That's the cause. That's the rock bottom and that's the cause of everything.

Yeah. And in fact, what I'll do is, now what I'm going to do is I'm going to practice the opposite to fear, which is love. Hello. It's not the opposite. It's not the opposite. It's under. You had a different experience. When I looked under every single fear I had, there was an image of me either dying from starvation and either extreme heat or extreme cold. Every single fear had this just image and then it was just like, yeah, it's just a whole lot of triggers in. It's a whole lot of the environmental stuff. It's really quite intense. It's a lot of things. It's a lot of things.

It's a lot of things. It's a lot of things. It's a lot of things. It's a lot of things. It's a lot of things. It's a lot of things. It's a lot of things. It's a lot of things. It's a lot of things. It's a lot of things. It's a whole lot of the environmental stuff. It's really quite neutral. So it was really like, I guess the neutral approach, but rather fullness being the ultimate approach. It was kind of interesting. I mean, it didn't go further than that at that time. And since somebody has taken me back through some possible past life thing or whatever, but the upshot is that it's become clear when these things trigger in just what kind of other notions are popping in, images for me.

There's just stuff in a kind of themed area, but at the end of the day, it does start to unravel and disappear. It's so in accord. It just, you know, something opens up and then something else opens up. These conversations are wonderful, aren't they? If you can sense, if you can just start to sense that love, that there is something beneath fear, if you can just start to sense it, and from there, you talked about compassion earlier, you'll soften. You will just soften. There'll be a softness that starts to come over you. That's what I want. And the same thing, we've done it before many, many times together, when you think about anger, when you think about reacting to someone threatening you, you see why do you care.

You allow yourself anything that comes up and then you dive deeper. You go to the bottom of your heart and you find that vulnerability and that urge to defend it and protect it. Isn't that exquisite? Isn't that the sweetest thing? Instead of hating your anger or hating your fear or hating any sort of these responses, you look deeper and you see what's the core of it. Where are they all streaming from? And then you find the source. You find your source. Beautiful. And reside there. Reside there instead of in the fear. These are just all pointers, by the way. Oh, I know. Just totally pointers.

I get it. But whilst you're moving through the universe at this stage. You're at a different level tonight. Thank you. Get under there. Because it's there. And see what the elegant way of getting rid of resistance without really resisting the resistance. Without, yes, you don't want to be angry over your anger. You don't want to be fearful. You don't want to be fearful of your fear. You don't want to resist your resistance. You just investigate it. You look around it. You see, you witness it. You see the movement of energy. You see the vibration. As we spoke today, you know, the lump in the throat or the closeness or whatever.

And you find deliciousness with it. Because the moment you watch it, you observe it, it becomes impersonal. You are watching an object. You are aware of the object. And you are the awareness. You are ready free. Whatever is the content, whether you're behaving like a good girl or you are a nasty bitch, you're still the awareness of the pattern expressing itself. What a freedom. Oh, I love the nasty bitch, I have to say. Beautiful. Yeah, I do too. I turn back and watch it and I go, you go, girl. And consequences. She gets consequences. Don't you worry. It's all worth it. Do all that without the root.

Yeah. That's why I said that point is, don't get stuck in that. I don't mind if she's a bitch as long as she doesn't really hurt anybody. I mean, if she does, again, you don't know. I mean, exactly. I told you the most painful three years of my life were the years just prior to the liberation from suffering. I could never be grateful enough to the guy who made me suffer. The suffering is a wake-up call. Oh, I love that. So if you are, if you are, I'm just saying. If you are going to take credit for making someone suffer or for hurting someone, just get humble.

It's not you. It's the life expressing through available pattern. It's worth saying to Judith, and you used the word delicious, you know, talking about driving in traffic and getting into a traffic jam or coming down the Hube and you've got to wait ten minutes. Mine is just an automatic expanding, you know, just expand it. But it doesn't always lead immediately to delicious, you know. I mean, and make that all right too. That's what I just wanted to say. And, you know, sometimes I just have to sit with it ten, fifteen minutes, but it's, and it sort of, it passes through, you know, but it's a broader, you know, it's just a broader thing, you know.

It's great to sit with something non-delicious before you discover its deliciousness. Because it's only shifting colors. It's only shifting consciousness. I mean, I used to myself, I used to believe that anger is nasty. It feels bad. The energy feels unpleasant. But when I take the label anger of it, what is it? What's unpleasant about it? It's just another movement. It's just another expression. Once upon a time, I used to get a lot of rage. And I was meditating once and there was rage. And once the label went away, it was a surges of energy. Yes, I love that. And then it went away and never came back.

Really, really. It was just surges. Yeah, yeah. That's good. And that's what anger is. If you take away the label, what is it? Yes, it's the label that will make it bubble when you label it. Well, and we attach a whole lot of things to that as well. Again, on top of it. I'm identifying it as rage. I do have it sometimes when I get into a total knot. You know, I get all knotted. And, no, no, no, no. And then suddenly, like, watch it. And then, you know, it all starts to dissipate. Oh, yummy. That's the delicious. And Bob has a beautiful way of talking about it.

Bob, can you say it? Like the way you put the label, you load yourself up with all the previous... Yeah, yeah. Say it the way you say it. What was it? The label. If you label something as fear... Yeah. How do you know? Yeah. It's a sensation. We have all sorts of sensations all the time. Even to put that label on. Now, this one we label as fear. This one we label as anger or depression or whatever. When did you label them? Years ago when you learnt words and you had this sensation. And somebody told you this one was anger or this one was... And you felt...

And every time it comes up from then on, you've loaded yourself down with all the previous sensations you've had and given it something seemingly solid, something real. And it becomes overwhelming. Yeah. So that's the missing word that I was thinking about. You load yourself down with all the previous fears because the label comes from the past experiences, from the memories, from what you learned. So this is fear. How do I know? I felt it before. And now all what you felt before, oh yes, that's right. Oh, this is fear. That hurts. What happens if you see it fresh in you? As though you're seeing it for the first time.

That's what it's like. Without the label. Without the label. Like Moira said, it's a surge of energy. And you can be curious about it just like the baby, looking at anything, just curious. Sometimes when nothing happens with something, I'd best describe it as adrenaline coming up, but it just, it appears that that gets too much for this. So it goes into thought, it goes into meaning making, belief in, it goes off. And it just seems that this adrenaline thing, I don't know, it's just a bit short. Not to sit with it, not to say with it, there's something about it that it's not acceptable in the habit.

And that's so right. That's what we do. And this is very important observation, Tony, and bravo because many, many people don't see it throughout their lifetime. This is the way to cope with energies that are too strong. Go to the head. Live the experience. Go to the head. Make a story about it. Distract yourself from the immediacy of the sensation and go to the thoughts instead. This is the way to avoid feelings, to feel less. But it doesn't work because it backfires. You're going to feel something different in a minute. When the story constructs itself, it will backfire and it may even become worse. People cut themselves and put salt on the wounds to distract themselves from the pain that they are getting, emotional pain from the thoughts they believe.

That's not even one of those Lasko ones where you see it happening, where you go, oh, yes, God, I'm going to do this. I'm going to do this. I'm going to do this. I'm going off to watch that movie now. And you kind of know that the addiction thing's starting up now. It's more one that I just don't notice. It's just adrenaline up. And then gone. I'm off in prairie land. I've never really seen what happens if it's stayed with because it's not... Whereas the other ones I do sort of there's a sense it's uncomfortable. The resistance is noticed and then there's the urge felt to go to something another.

out to go to something and then it's you're there doing it and another thing that is important and i know tony you are purely and utterly aware of this one is that if there is a pattern of responding in this way responding through the running to the head when the emotions are unbearable or cutting yourself when the emotional pain is unbearable those are patterns again they are not mine i'm not guilty of them i'm not wrong this is the pattern that life has created through every prior millisecond of existence of that particular pattern it grows it and the whole universe contributes to that particular pattern so there is no space and no place for any sort of guilt so it's not good or bad no it's not right or wrong absolutely i have noticed something is when there's a problem i know how to fix it and i'll go and buy something financially i'll fix it like the mechanic couldn't fix something so i went and bought something and i'll kind of fix it myself and it'll cost a lot of money i cover so i don't feel it does that make sense basically medicating with shopping yeah well yeah not not it's hard to explain i can't explain it but yes i do i buy something it's not like buying a dress to make myself feel better no no it's um you buy a solution i buy a solution yes yeah it's not the dress no i don't go and buy makeup or a dress no no no no no i quickly shut off the experience and go oh well i'll fix it yeah yeah i will fix this i did it today i saw it hundreds of dollars because i'll fix it now i can drive off and know it's all okay i've done so only so i don't feel the pain of what whatever and see the pattern with no judgment but there is it is i've been seeing it i'm seeing it more i saw it today and went it's neither good nor bad it's just as it is thank you totally okay thank you it doesn't hurt anybody majorly except maybe my partner you know i don't know i don't know i don't know i don't know i don't know i don't know he might sort of go wow i've got to say but honey you made me feel better you had to do it i don't know what it's that choice you had no choice that's the only way i know that's exactly right is this is how mechanically the pattern perpetuates itself you didn't do it can i tell my husband now probably not no that's fine i'm not gonna get away with it wasn't me me i didn't do it tell them that pretend that never really happened and love do that and you'll never hate the idea because later on you'll ending your life with behaviorて extra и that when things get noticed they tend to disappear at some point so you know yeah actually the trajectory is good actually i think i didn't recognize it today and i wasn't able to stop myself there has been times when i have been able to i've kind of recognized it and i've gone no you're not going to do anything about it today who was able to stop yourself i don't know mate see that's the thing sometimes the pattern works the way that it is possible to uh for it to break and sometimes it doesn't actually embarrassed and also whatever you're gonna tell your husband you don't know no that's true yeah actually i'm hoping you won't say anything don't even think about it don't even think what you're gonna do next just leave it spontaneously yeah and watch it unfold yeah watch it unfold what does the embarrassment feel like the other thing that you were saying before and i just just wanted to clarify um the word acceptance okay what that actually really means because there's a lot of people get a bit confused about that um and i've heard a lot of people over the years make this statement i accept it but doesn't mean i have to like it yeah yeah i've heard that one that's not acceptance that's tolerance that's tolerance that's a very conservative approach totally totally totally not acceptance in the pure acceptance of what is you're out of the way so there's no like because it's just it just is what it is no matter what so there's no like or dislike acceptance is non-action yeah it's like there is no movement yes there's no internal movement around it it's an absence of any sort of judgment you can't try to have acceptance can you no no but it's going to be a spontaneous thing exactly but acceptance some doesn't eat you you're already sometimes someone else sees it it's your spouse so it's not what the situation is but okay so uh with with the first wave of oppression a little bit deeper is that situation and then so it can be the instant if there's not any contradiction and then this moment copies your life when you realize that is an acceptance that is walking through you and so thing as i said before is a natural part of the story even if you imagine not there is no automatic expression or my Behati does not exist you understand if there's a acceptance is a acceptance and you see, ah, okay, that's how this moment looks like.

There is a resistance included, there is a person included, but I am the awareness of that resistance and that person. That's already much, much more light. And then there is a deepest level in which you are completely uninvolved in the way the appearance appears. You're just there, you're just awareness of being, which is bliss. And that's neither acceptance or rejection. Just as it is. Just as it is. I love it when you say that, Bob. It doesn't mean there will be, acceptance is just a dropping of resistance at any moment. Absence, you're right. Acceptance is an absence of resistance. Absence. That's right. Every word acceptance implies someone that's gonna accept something.

Acceptance, time's up. Even the words. Yes, yes, Bob is showing time's up. Time's up. Time's up? Yes. You had enough fun? Yes. It was fun tonight. Thank you. It was fun. Thank you. Thank you. Thanks guys, that was great.